My Birthday Already??

This morning, I am greeted with this lovely blog entry snippet from the now-famous Miss Amy Steinberg:
-=Then, I receive a wonderful myspace message from Janet Planet in Hot Springs, South Dakota. (Where?) Now I have never played the Dakota's because I wasn't sure that people actually LIVED there. Snicker. But much to my surprise there is what Janet calls a VORTEX of spiritual energy here in Hot Springs, and she has come upon my music and wants me to come through!

The magical thing is that she got my music from another myspacer who got my music from another myspacer, etc... And it's this song "Exactly" that is drawing this positive force. So incredible! We reap what we sow, and I think that piece has brought a lot of light to a lot of people. Yay. So there's the fill in date, and now I've got my stop between Salt Lake and Omaha.=-

To which I was forced to reply:
Is that your ONLY plan for South Dakota?? I'm just 5 hours due East of Rapid City, right on the freeway, in Sioux Falls. I KNOW I can find a place for you to play here if ya wanna... or I can just hook you up with some great company and some good eats while ya pass through...
Lemme know!! :)
~diana~hoping this is the universe making up for me not being able to see you tomorrow at Lovejoys!~

To which she responded:
this is bizarre and incredible...although totally normal, but miracles and blessings are so abundant i am still shocked by them!

i would absolutely love to come through your city, even if it's just to stay with you for an evening... you saved my life one day...

if you'd like we could look into me doing a show, a small one set coffeehouse gig or something? i have several shows in a row right after it, but it actually does cut the drive into smaller pieces... i am in omaha that tuesday...

date we are looking at is monday, may 28th... let me know your thoughts.

all love
amy

And of course:
Oh man, oh man, oh man! someones love me... all them someones on the other side! My birthday is **May 27** and I celebrate for the next 18 days!!! I get Amy for my birthday! I'm so glad I was borned!! Wooo Hoo!!! I'm a dancin fool!!!!!!
I will ask my wondermous new boyfriend, who happens to be a local musician (myspace.com/wumpus --he's the drummer) to check out the perfect soo foo locale for my gal :) (ooooh and I'll have to tell you how much he deserved listening to Emphatic at the Attic....)

Oh my! Not gonna be sleeping tonight...

Much Love to You, my goddess
~diana <3>

Tena?! Brian?! Jamie?! Wade?! I guess now we know what we're doing for our birthdays!!! Wooot!

24 et al

I dunno if I'm cut out to watch show... or maybe I'm just not cut out to be a good American. (Spoiler alert!!) The Tom situation, the twisting of the truth, blaming of the not- so- innocent- but- really- innocent- this- time- peace- maker, the dishonesty of the VP, the (eeeww) sheeple in the Cabinet... I want to vomit, my head is spinning!! I'm so glad it's just television and completely made up, :::cough, cough, cough, wretch:::: I'm thinking Canada... maybe even New Zealand or Australia... I just don't wanna live in a place where truth never has a "T" and is pliable for anyone to fit their purposes... Lucky for us, this never, ever, ever happens in Real America. We only go to war after the Facts are in (not to be confused with facts) and the ts are crossed and the is are dotted and the egos are stroked and the pockets are lined... oh wait! did I really type that?! No, I can't give up now... I still L♥VE my date with Kiefer (didja know his grandpa was voted The Greatest Canadian in 2004? He's the *father* of their socialized medicine) and I know there'll be some kind of trite "bow wrapping" at the end of the season... and a cliff hanger for next year :)
Ah, shit! We can't leave the country without our Government Mandated- from pharmaceutical companies who remain free from consequence for their actions- vaccinations...
The Constant Gardener, has ruined that for me, too, along with the option of ever wanting to visit Africa... okay, maybe I was already on this path with delaying vaccinations in my kids from suspicion surrounding the government propaganda given to me by any and all medical "professionals", plus all the brain tumor/polio vax schtuff I've discovered (thanks to Mitch's coincidental brain tumor & the crazy- but- ringing- true article in Penthouse, July 2001), then the The Origin of AIDS filling in gaps between the ideas already burned there... this movie, well, it made it all waaaaay to fecking REAL. Yeah, I know it's a movie, I'd really, really, really like to pretend this is some kind of Quintin Tarantino construct or maybe even George Lucas, but I know, deep down in my beyond-human soul, that there is waaaaay too much Truth in fiction for it to sit comfortably with my heart. When the dark-skinned mama is turned away from the American run hospital with her very sick baby by the light skinned American Pharmaceutical Worker who explains, "You refused our vaccinations, we refuse to treat your child." I can't help but just know this really does happen. Welcome to Free Enterprise.
It gets worse. I'm so glad I don't have a car. I may become a "bikini lady" like the one we see walking all over town reading her books, in a bikini when weather permits and humidity demands. She has no guilt when she watches a movie like Syriana. Didja see Traffic? What Traffic did to inspire your faith in our country's drug laws and their incredibly benevolent intentions :::spit, spit, spit, pwew::: for American Citizens & Humans everywhere, Syriana will do for you with our country's relationship with Big Oil, Free Enterprise, Middle-East Infighting and Weak Infrastructure, and hell, America's attitude toward humans in general... Yeah, I hope that story's all made up too... My tummy tells me it's not.
Tonight's movie choices: Serendipity or Crash??? One of these films is more made-up than the other... and it's not the one I wish it was.

The REAL Queen of England...

turns 6♥ today!! ♥ Yay! I, for one, am eternally grateful that Reginald Dwight Howard has graced this planet with his existence. ♥

Only one birthday request from the man... end bigotry. Not a tough request: grant marriage licenses to all (consenting adults) who ask for one. The go'ment is supposed to be blind anyway, who cares about gender when L♥ve is the real issue?

When I turn 6♥, I don't need that kinda party (6♥th concert at Madison Square Garden), I don't even need a cool Bill Clinton introduction or DVD sales... what I d♥ need (aside from lots of Elt♥n music), what we all need, is the kind of L♥ve Elton has finally found in his partner, David. All those songs finally mean something; you got your ♥ne! Get down fatboy! We're s♥ glad you've c♥me...

Strange coupla days...

*uniquely* strange :) I'm celebrating and mourning for a family I've not met, I'm celebrating and mourning for families I don't even know exist... and I've looming fear. Big, pull me away from everything dear in the name of emotional protection, kinda fear. Oh, I'm not one to be terribly obvious, except maybe to myself, so I just crab-ass and hold my breath and slowly back away from love. It's what I do. I'd say it doesn't work, it sure isn't working in my now though I imagine it's served great purpose for me before. Know the best thing about being gregarious?? (read: worst thing) It always seems that I'm engaged. I can have you engaged and not even be there. That's a terrible thing to admit. Maybe it's a Gemini trait; could just be something I picked up along the way to becoming diana. I slip away easily. I'm like Claire: impossible to forget and hard to remember. I'm distant when I'm too close. I'm crabby when kindness counts. I embrace martyrdom with sighs and stomps. Life is good and I'm shitty. blech.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Gemini: You Twins are more susceptible to the changes of your own emotions with the Moon visiting your Sun sign. The positive side of this is that you can deal with sudden mood swings better than most other signs. However, don't fall into the trap of over-intellectualizing; instead just let your emotions ramble freely.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

In light of this admonition, I'll end my pissiness and get my trash taken out and my cat box cleaned and I'll kiss and hug my boyfriend and I'll love on my kid. Life is good and I have a choice.

Strange day indeed...

I was all over the emotional map, er, globe today. I had a pity party for strangers, I had one for myself, I had a joyful, enlightening talk with an old friend, my boyfriend fed me an orange, I chatted with a plumber, had great discussions with my son, attended my kitty's needs for love and affection and had a family gathering of friends, including a gift of Hannah's clothing.
Pretty freaking cool.
Scotty being here for most of it, sitting quietly, focused on homework and catching up... a calming presence. He would have easily jumped into the madness; I'm so glad he was stuck at his computer, it was such a blessing to have a touchstone of stability while I did my whirling dervish routine.
I'm gonna curl up with a book, ignoring any & all universal messages included therein... there has to be a harlequin romance around here somewhere... I'm actually open to all messages sent under the guise of bodice ripping and rippled abs owned by the smoldering Han Solo types, as a general rule ♥
See what I mean?

Truth on Thursday

The Ground Truth: the Human Cost of War
a film by Patricia Foulkrod

"Anyone who claims to support the troops, owes it to them to see the film and hear their stories."

The Ground Truth we meet veterans---patriotic young men and women who heeded the call for military service in Iraq. Take one hour out of your day and listen to what "Support the Troops" means to them.

DATE: Thursday, March 22nd
COST: FREE
TIME: 8 pm
PLACE: Sankofa Coffehouse & Bistro - 41st & Lake

To reserve a seat, or for more information, contact SD Peace & Justice, 743-5647.

Summary of The Ground Truth:
Filmmaker Patricia Foulkrod produced and directed this documentary, designed to shed light on a little examined side of war -- the soldiers who do the fighting. The Ground Truth: The Human Cost of War focuses on the men and women who fought in the War in Iraq, but found themselves largely ignored in the media coverage of the conflict and in their treatment by the military bureaucracy when they came back from the front lines. In extensive interviews with veterans of the Iraq war, these men and women talk about the hardships of war, the danger of serving in a country where the people you defend often consider you the enemy, the onset of post-traumatic stress disorder, the gap between media coverage of the war and the grim realities soldiers see on the battlefield, and the often callous treatment extended to soldiers by military authorities and the Veterans Administration. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide

Running Time: 1 hour 12 minutes
Director(s): Patricia Foulkrod
Awards: 2006 - Women Film Critics Circle - Best Documentary

Support the Troops! Support the Truth!

Meet Hayden...

Have I mentioned how much I love Sinfest?

I am X!!

Your Personality Is Like Ecstasy

You're usually feeling the love for the world around you - you want to hug everyone. And while you're usually content to sit back and view the world with wonder... Sometimes you're world becomes very overwhelming and a little scary.

What Drug Is Your Personality Like?

Flowers are Safe!

I don't need to ask a daisy, I can just enjoy them.
He loves me and I already know!
We have such an amazing time every time we're together, I'm just filled with awe.

Even on Saturday morning, when I my first words were, "I'm crabby!" I was forgiven. Given wide berth, yeah, and genuinely forgiven.
Wumpus was part of a three band line-up for St. Patrick's Day. Lisa & Brian chaperoned me again ♥ Was very fun! The first band, Alive from Heaven, had a cutie patootie drummer with perfect dreads (I saw Niki at the park on Tuesday, she offered to do mine!!); he later let me pet him! In the quick quiet times between, I got to meet the Scooty Crew :) There was the Wumpus table, where I got to give a quick, inspiring unschooling spiel to a "just found out we're pregnant" dad, Carey (& his lovely wife Adrienne), who also happened to train Lisa at Gateway 10 years ago! Then I saw my friend, Veronica, who happens to be dating the W bass player & I had a bizarre memory of hanging out at Natalie's last summer, drinking wine on her porch, playing with the kids, including Veronica's boyfriend's daughter while he was at band practice & I met him when he picked her up -- makes your head spin, doesn't it?? Kim, the cool librarian, works with my cousin Liz. Sven was a sweetheart, great brownies! Liam knows V and via too much conversation, I discover he works with my house-mate Susan at Citibank! I got to show myself to the very important Jenn, on her next-to-last day in town before moving to El Paso. There was a big KDLT crew in attendance, as well... I was so glad I'd heard stories of everyone before we met, it was like a mental matching game story + person. I heard He's the nicest guy I know at least 15 times during the night. Libby's face when she witnessed our kiss was priceless - I met her on our first date, during the infamous (and all too freaky) "preserve my kitty's fur" talk. I love being surrounded by such brave folk! The last band was The Madhats by the way, from Spearfish, SD. They were really good!

Silver-tipped red hair
you are completely infused
now you're part of me
~S

We spent a good amount of yesterday all wrapped up in photographs of Life and Everything. It was perfect. I got to be melancholy and sad and giggly and misty and lost and found again.

Browsing through photos
-The ghost in you, she won't fade-
series of moments
~S
Fully lost in you
leaving an old life behind
preconceptions scrapped
~S

Hoping you're sleep
burning candles at both ends
a contract fulfilled
~S

4 years...

and finally the CHRISTians have something to say...

"This war, from a Christian point of view, is morally wrong — and was from the beginning," the Rev. Jim Wallis, founder of Sojourners/Call to Renewal, one of the event's sponsors, said toward the end of the service to cheers and applause. "This war is ... an offense against God."

In his speech, the Rev. Raphael G. Warnock, senior pastor at Atlanta's Ebenezer Baptist Church, lashed out at Congress for being "too morally inept to intervene" to stop the war, but even more harshly against President Bush.

"Mr. Bush, my Christian brother, we do need a surge in troops. We need a surge in the nonviolent army of the Lord," he said. "We need a surge in conscience and a surge in activism and a surge in truth-telling."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Peace, it's not just for pagan hippies anymore.

Musings...

Gemini: You may be thinking about postponing or even canceling an upcoming trip due to responsibilities you cannot avoid. The hardest part about this is not just changing your plans; the disappointment can bring up memories of a similar event from the past. Letting go of your feelings attached to a previous experience can help you focus your attention and efficiently manage the current situation.
***********************************************
I want a big vacation. I deserve a big vacation. I am the girl who takes really big vacations. I make it work. Always. Bizarre but True. I'm going to Life is Good, it's gonna be amazing and fulfilling and all that wonderful diana's-crazy-life stuff that manifests around me. This is an already gonna happen and not in doubt...
I wanna go to California and yeah, I feel like I gotta go to California. Mitch's Gramma hasn't had the greatest year, she just turned 89 and I want to see her as often as I can, while I still can. There's a lot that comes with that visit. There's great strides in the Mimi sitch and I know this is a great journey- our relationship- as our family morphs and shifts. She'll be freshly retired and ready to live a new life with 50 more hours a week for her family!
The sunshine beckons me,
I have to move soon,
I don't wanna be gone so long,
My cat will miss me, the kids will miss me, my boyfriend will miss me ♥
I will miss Christine and ZoAnne and Chance and Gary and Lenetta and and and and...
~~I must say right now, that this is exactly why it sucks to be a Gemini sometimes!!~~
I dunno what's gonna happen, I can see it either way :) As I don't yet have Howard, I guess there's really no decision to be made at this point...
Light a candle for Howard and channel some healing energy for Uncle Troy:

What if...

Hayden crawled into the empty, but still warm spot left by Scotty and we all chatted as S got ready for work. A few days before, he called Scotty's phone and sang the Campfiresong Song for his voicemail, as Scotty really loved it, Hayden was happy to sing for him again for future listening. When we were alone, I asked him how he feels about Scotty... he says he hope we get married. Then provide him with a new sibling next year. What if?? What does that look like? What does that feel like? Joy abound surrounding and awaiting us on this adventure, I can taste it.
This is all very ethereal and tingly and oh so very strange. The Secret was a great reminder of the vocabulary and practice of what I'd already laid foundation for in our lives. Because I know that Hayden has great power in his understanding of how the Universe works, I can see his order being fulfilled before our eyes. I know we'll have the perfect home, because we will. I know I have Great Love in my Life, because I do. I know we will always have Joy, because we know how to find it. Gratitude isn't nearly a big enough word. Amazing, our Life is Pure Amazing Grace right now... mmmmmm!

today, exactly

Gemini: It's rather difficult for you to focus your mind on your immediate responsibilities, but this is exactly what you must do. Temporarily set aside your desire for fun and pleasure in order to meet a deadline or to plan for what's ahead. Take full advantage of this moment to accomplish as much as possible to pave the wave for your future success.
*no time to blog, only one internet connection at the moment... I've got more to say though, much more, much, much more, very soon!*

God as Gary

Meet Gary and his tribe... He's the True Love of Christine, conjured by pure Love and Majik ♥ I'm so glad he was born and I'm even more glad our paths have crossed on this crazy journey of Life. Thank you for the gift you are to the world, especially this little corner of it! You are truly a Blessing Manifest!

I'm just excited to show off Christine's beautiful art work and her amazing Spawn ♥

I am a Haiku geek!

I'm thinking I should convert my talk next month entirely to haiku form :)
Floating through my life lately:

My Life is my Own
This is the Path I travel
Joy as my Master.
~me

Homework: like the sea
while spring break week comes and goes,
I'm so tired of school.
~S

The stars will align
When we find ourselves alone
Oh! How I'll take you!
~S

On Yacht Rock:
Oh Mike McDonald...
Sail the Seas of smooth music?
...Walter Becker's bitch.
~S

What a happy day!
Alex won the six-foot sub,
which I will help eat! :)
~S

You dare say to me:
"It's for my pleasure, not yours"
You selfish bastard!
~me

On the commute home
Hannah's flower on the dash
hoping she likes me :)
~S

Wanting to see you~
the thought occurs to me that
I am with you still.
~S

Valentine ATC Pictures

Scotty had them in his book, so I took the opportunity to get a picture ♥
"Universality" reads: Love is Good Karma,
"When first we met" reads: Once in a Blue Moon,
and the self-titled "Ordinary Turned Extraordinary"

Why I read my horror-scope

Sometimes a girl just needs a bit of reinforcement from the heavens...
from Midco today:
Gemini: Go ahead and trust those instincts, especially if you're considering taking a radical new step on your life's path. While it may seem overwhelming at first, you'll muddle through somehow. A fresh start awaits.
My life is rockin' and rollin' right now... It always seems overwhelming and I'm always tempted to go there, but somehow I do, indeed, muddle through. For me right now, it's a nod to Scotty, it's approval for the home we seek, it's the income I don't yet know is ready for me, it's embarking on a whole new chapter and here I am at the precipice, mindful and present, ready, willing and able to choose where I go and who I am on this path. Pretty fecking cool!
then from tarot.com:
Gemini: Even the most difficult relationship may now become easier to handle, but beware that this will not last unless you face the underlying problems. You are likely on the right track, but circumstances might require you to alter your plans. Be ready to change your direction and plot a new course. Holding on to the past can stand between you and future success.
I think of Hayden when I read this. He inspires me to recreate myself time and time again, to be his mom-in-the-moment. Early this morning (Monday) I got up Scotty-early and we had three hours of just us, talking and laughing, watching silly TV and making commentary. Doin' it the same ol' way in a new dimension isn't fair to any of us... figuring out the now and letting go of the then sure sounds like a good tactic. I almost began kvetching about the ways I've not done that for my son; On a gentler-to-myself approach, I am excited to be here anticipating what I shall do for my son and who I shall be with him in the moments he needs his mommy.
I am so Blessed.

Up for air

O Great Sovereign One
Make me your Puerto Rico
I shall be conquered

Yeah, like that. After our first night of incredible passionate, crazy making out :)
Hayden was feeling the heat... he's asked to come in a few times. We parted and made welcome, he chatted with us for a bit, then went on about his business. It was a great test of where he fits in the equation; upon realizing it's still a team approach, he was comforted enough to be autonomous again. We went right back to our business as well ;) We've discovered a really cool time trick (though it may only work on days S doesn't go to school) whereby we take a big afternoon nap and spend 12-3 am exploring... giggity, giggity, giggity, oooooh yeah!
I did not get a nap yesterday, however, and we had a big evening with lots o'kids & bowling alley madness! As I wanted to sleep, I broke out full-coverage comfy jammies. Didn't work, though... they're flanneled on the skin side and red satin on the outside... Scotty magnet! Oh darn, gave up sleep for molestation, not a bad trade ::bg::
Today we are resisting our draw and retreating to neutral corners; him for homework and me for writing ♥ 'salright, we'll break out the jammies again tonight :)
Hey Mel & Eric - thanks! ♥

Happy Haiku

Our Souls shine bright white,
Sublime need not be subtle,
I Love You Love Me.
~me

In my dreams today
we met my whole family
now they love you too
~S.

~all the more amazing because I received Scotty's poem as I was sending mine to him- Divine Timing!!~

My year, by Christine

today's all too funny quote!

“The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals, and 362 to heterosexuals. This doesn't mean God doesn't love heterosexuals, it's just that they need more supervision.”

~ Lynn Lavner, a lesbian comic

More MySpace Vortex

There's been a guy running round my head lately... just one of those inklings, I wonder what Chris is up to?? I hope he's happy, whatever he's doing... Then Lisa mentions she saw his brother around, cementing my thoughts of Chris. I even did a search for his name, nothing. Last night, I'm stealing, er, borrowing the Wumpus picture for my blog, which led me to the Spooncat! page, which, of course, led to the Janitor Bob and the Armchair Cowboys page, and viola! There was Chris' smiling face :)
It's always a tough day for me, when I have to tell someone who knew and loved Hannah, that she is transitioned... Chris was especially tough, as the last time I saw him, he was fully intent on ignoring his gift to the universe and by golly, he was gonna kill himself right and proper by whatever available chemical. He's been sober since Hannnah's left... I think it's a perfect measure for his sobriety and more importantly, his Self-Love. I didn't quite believe he was real, even after his message this morning, so I went to his work and got to hug him my own Self (only because my incredible boyfriend loaned me his car for the afternoon!) and look in his eyes and see that he is Alive and has a Life and is finally beginning to recognize his own gifts.
We're gonna meet for coffee on Monday and get our catching up done right :) I'll be giving him a packet of Hannah to keep in his wallet -- we talked about it and he wants to resist, but he knows all to well that resistance is futile ♥

Wheel of Fortune

Wheel of Fortune
May Change support your growth.
Deck: Cagliostro
My Daily Tarot Reading
card art © US Games

The central theme of what is traditionally called the Wheel of Fortune card is cyclical change. The Wheel keeps on rolling, churning events in a ceaseless progression of ups and downs, either way freeing us from the past. No one can escape its cyclical action, which can feel somewhat terrifying -- no matter whether we are rising or falling. When one is balanced on top there is a moment of crystal clarity, but the only part of the Wheel not going up and down is the hub, which is your eternal Self, the Source of Freedom.

Every one of us will occupy all the points on the wheel at some time or another. The cycle of the wheel is its lesson -- and we can learn to take comfort in it (as we do when we celebrate our birthday). If you don't like the look of things right now, just wait -- things will change. Of course, if you do like the look of things right now, enjoy it while it lasts, because that will change too!

Wumpus

There they are... in the bar where we met.
I kinda dig the guy on drums.

Would You Be Friends With Yourself?

I find this question difficult, not a one word response. I'm a tough friend to hold on to.
I wonder how much attention I give to BEing a good friend. Oh, I'm nice and I'm a heck of a lot of fun, I've even got great ideas for schtuff! Then I don't show up. I don't call. I don't answer the phone. It's icky. Then, later on, I do show up and I expect everything to be jes'fine! Blech!
What is that?
What's the payoff?
Why would a woman with the world by tail, suddenly let go to pretend to look at butterflies?
It's not that I have better things to do, I'm not having a session of wild sex or being swept off to Paris for the weekend, heck I'm not even particularly melancholy. Just asocial. Not gonna deal with people. Zero desire. Manners out the window.
A stand to be taken. What kind of friend am I gonna be? Who will show up tomorrow? What will I say to mySelf when my gumption is gone? What will conjure it from netherwhere? What will I say to the girls? What coaching do I want? What coaching will be effective? What will it look like? What will it feel like?
I got some majik to work out!

The intimacy of a blog

Hypocrisy. That's what a blog calls you on. Oh it's great for tracking your own growth, what you learn and how you use it. It's generally a safe place for one's rants and raves through growing pains. And then one of those raving moments comes back to test your true resolve.
I made a pretty strong point when questioning the reasons behind those who have conjured me into their lives, only to decide otherwise. In my recent surround of Wisdom (I recommend the trinity, er, trilogy of The Journey Home, V for Vendetta and The Matrix) I realize my role, the gifts for me, the gifts from me, and the gifts of me. I wrote that blog carefully, so as not to transmit false orders onto the gods-that-be, but to indeed find a way to conjure some gratitude for my own lessons and growth. Then I found this really cool picture to end my rave, a reinforcement of the order I consciously place with the Universe. And here I am... realizing someone was listening. I'm swimming through fear and joy and wonder and gratitude and a million other tingly things that don't yet have vocabulary, which are beyond categorization.
It's funny to hear the voice of my fiercely independent and single-partying Self scream, "but we're not ready for our last first time!!" To which the fiercely independent, OWL facilitating, sexually free chick responds, with tongue clucking, "My god! It's sex!! It will be grrrreat!! hellllloo?! We deserve it!" From the comfy corner, surrounded by flannel and fleece, the matron who is welcoming and ready, ♥ is too breathing a sigh of relief as the moon tide washes the decision making out of our hands for a few more days.
I love the soap opera of my own mind.
It's a great thing to be open, it's a great thing to be alive while we still can be.
It amazing when we honor the contracts of our Soul.

I have the answers...

Thanks Jackie!

My own Journey Home

Divine timing... my entire life is about divine timing! I was called to purchase that book, I was called to finish reading it, I am now called to examine what the story means in my own life.
Our hero, Michael Thomas, learns incredible lessons of faith and truth and love... his journey is shadowed by his own former, not-yet-evolved Self, the Self full of fear and anxiety about change, the Self of comfort and knowing even at the cost of happiness. His present Self has to confront the Self's shadow, stand strong and choose a new path, a path without comfort, the path of the unknown, the Soul's true path, the path without guarantees, the path of risk, the path of Faith, the path of becoming more than who is possible right this moment.
I'm there, I'm at a new place, yet another new opportunity in my life.
A chance to confront my shadowy fears and get on to the sunshiney life I deserve.

All I ever needed to know, I learned from Ree

Just when I thought I had exhausted her kitchen wisdom, I stumble across this -- now I gotta schlep my ass down to the store again for some Steak! Quite honestly, I have no idea how to cook a steak well (well, I can brown chunks well done for burritos, et al, but not an actual steak I'd eat). I'll begin the quest for the cast iron skillet... don' worry, I'll be sure to document my cow flesh adventures!

Blizzard Bonus!

We had a real SD Blizzard move through this week - what a treat!! The weather geeks are so excited that we have weather they're all beside themselves with JOY!! As the excitement began Thursday night, my trusty news engineer went to work in the evening and slept on a studio sofa sans blankets, so as to be there in the morning when everyone would be demanding some live news about what the heck to do when the entire city shuts down because of unexpected (March has historically always been the snowiest month here) dumping of glorious snow! I got to welcome Scotty at the end of his show, and turn over my kitty and my bed for some much needed slumber on his part.

Me, on the other hand, I was sure to garner a trip to the grocery store from Ed... not only to enjoy his company and commentary on the weather, but also so I could do some cookin' with Ree!!! It was just that kinda day :)
First, I whipped up a chocolate sheet cake with Hayden. We're now baking the professional way with each ingredient carefully measured before we begin anything; makes me feel sooooooo Martha :) There was a bit of confusion, as Hayden read the recipe to me, we quickly realized that 4 heaping teaspoons of cocoa just don't have the same effect as 4 heaping tablespoons of cocoa will! Even if I didn't realize it until it was poured into the pan, didn't matter! We sprinkled on the extra cocoa and mixed it into our cake pan with a baby whisk! Ooooh this picture just can't convey the... oooey gooey loverlyness that IS this cake! Oh and because it's mine, I sprinkled half of the cake with dark chocolate chips!
And what the heck, while I was heating up our kitchen anyway, I thought I'd whip up some o'Ree's lasagna, too! Turns out I was missing some key ingredients for her recipe (like Garlic!), but I did have the basics and a lovely jar of Newman's Own Organic to pinch hit! Now I gotta say, I'm not one for meat in my pasta. Ida, the amazing Italian red-headed mother of an amazing former boyfriend of mine, inspired my cooking greatly! She (and then me) was a big fan of vegetarian pasta dishes, with her (and now mine!) wondermous meatballs served on the side. I must say, though, I really love the gr. beef/hot sausage mixture Ree recommends!
As the pasta cooked, Scotty realized his time with us was limited, as Wumpus was to begin recording their Zombie music last evening... He was really sad to leave at feast time! Just as it was time to eat, we received the fateful message: Recording Session canceled for the weather! To celebrate, we had some of this! Which has only fueled Scotty's need to be at my house, near me, snuggled up and hibernating on my bed! And because I know the way to man's heart is through his Soul, I offered him some of this














And in return, I got this















I'd say we had a house of very, very comforted Souls and happy, happy faces!

I am so flattered...

...I think!? I just got this in my inbox at MySpace:

hello there,
are u into casual sex? im looking for a mature older lady to teach me some things...

First, I'm truly honored this kid thinks I've got some lessons he'd like to learn (probably so, nah, a verifiable truth); Second his assumption that I'm mature is a double edged sword for me: I doubt a mature (in the miss manners sense) woman is gonna be humping on a 19-year old from Menno, SD -- truly in any sense of the word, maturity would not play a part here, I don't see it; Third, older? older? Couldn't he have chosen: seasoned? ripened? peaking? experienced?

at least he called me a lady :::bg::: (again though! see my arguments with mature)

All this and he probably just wanted to ask me how to find the g-spot!

For your consideration: Scotty

Greetings. To those who have wondered about the mysterious interloper in Diana and Hayden's lives, I humbly offer the following, for your consideration.

My name is Scotty. I'll introduce myself as Scott, but should you be inclined for a second (or further) meeting, I'll always refer to myself as the above with the addition of they Y suffix. My mother always called me this, and it helps to differentiate myself from a famous California serial killer.

I work at a TV station, in production. This means that I spend time in a darkened control room, pressing buttons which then reward me by lighting up in multiple colors. I'm easily amused by such instant-reward devices.

I've been in college for what seems like twenty years or more. I probably should have started earlier, but I'm convinced that I wouldn't have been ready for the experience had I not been what I am, a thirty-something non-trad. I've played music all my life, fostered by my loving parents. This continues to this day, and I'm lucky enough to have surrounded myself by positive, accomplished musicians (although I'd never tell them this directly, to maintain a necessary facade) who I adore and love to make silly, fun, obnoxious music with. good people, they are.

What else would you like to know? I'm semi-secretive, and cherish my privacy. I'm a firm believer in universal karma. This translates directly into my dealings with other humans/animals: be nice, and in return, your life will be easier and more fulfilling. Don't be a jerk, or one's life will be less than it could be.

My past, present, and a look into my brain, to ease any concerns. Something new in my life is the addition of H and D. She's very, very different from other people I've dated, and I find her incredibly inspiring. i reeeeeally like her. i promise to you, her audience of internet people, that I shall treat her with the glorious respect she most clearly deserves.

I remain,

scotty