Gemini: Mercury the trickster is your very own planet and today he is confounding now that he has retrograded back into fellow air sign Aquarius. Everything might seem too easy now, yet you can still say the wrong thing, misinterpret what you hear, or screw up even the most simple communication. You could spend much of the day being frustrated or laughing. You choose which one.
Monday, February 26, 2007
Nothing is going to spoil this moment...
"Nothing is going to spoil this moment...Imagine making that
decision: nothing's going to spoil this moment. Now, imagine
making that decision about a relationship, job, day in the week,
or...whatever. Imagine applying that idea uniformly in your life."
--Neale Donald Walsch,
author of Conversations with God.
decision: nothing's going to spoil this moment. Now, imagine
making that decision about a relationship, job, day in the week,
or...whatever. Imagine applying that idea uniformly in your life."
--Neale Donald Walsch,
author of Conversations with God.
Ah, what a great thought! I've put it to practice today... as soon as I saw it!
Tonight Hayden and I baked!! We got chocolate chip surprise yellow cupcakes (to be frosted tomorrow) and loads of Ree's most wondermous cinnamon rolls!! (read the rest of her blog, she's pretty wondermous as well!).
Of course, as word spread of the Jenner Family Baking Extravaganza, we were quite blessed with a visit from Scotty :) I tried to send a big pan of the ooey-goodness with him, but he insisted I keep the big pan at my house (he took a littler, heartshaped pan to share at work tomorrow). No, not to become the jiggliest girl in the neighborhood (a warning from Ree of what happens if you keep them for yourself), but to feed to him on his frequent visits to my home (for the rolls!). He's not quite ready to propose (another warning from Ree) but he's sure well on his way to fallin' in Love, tee hee!
Pictures are coming!
Tonight Hayden and I baked!! We got chocolate chip surprise yellow cupcakes (to be frosted tomorrow) and loads of Ree's most wondermous cinnamon rolls!! (read the rest of her blog, she's pretty wondermous as well!).
Of course, as word spread of the Jenner Family Baking Extravaganza, we were quite blessed with a visit from Scotty :) I tried to send a big pan of the ooey-goodness with him, but he insisted I keep the big pan at my house (he took a littler, heartshaped pan to share at work tomorrow). No, not to become the jiggliest girl in the neighborhood (a warning from Ree of what happens if you keep them for yourself), but to feed to him on his frequent visits to my home (for the rolls!). He's not quite ready to propose (another warning from Ree) but he's sure well on his way to fallin' in Love, tee hee!
Pictures are coming!
Sunday, February 25, 2007
On the comicstrip theme...
read sinfest, it's gloriously diana :) search the archives for god, the hand puppet strips are especially hilarious! Oh and these come highly recommended:
i especially like wapsisquare.com and questionablecontent.net. one is about post-grad angst and the other is a mpls local esoteric. lovely artwork! so many others, i'm a connoisseur : ) scarygoround.com, and a lovable one called Copper (boltcity.com). bee is beautiful. (beecomix.com)
i especially like wapsisquare.com and questionablecontent.net. one is about post-grad angst and the other is a mpls local esoteric. lovely artwork! so many others, i'm a connoisseur : ) scarygoround.com, and a lovable one called Copper (boltcity.com). bee is beautiful. (beecomix.com)
What a difference a day makes!
I got to have Scotty to snuggle with to bring in the Big Hannahversary, a great way to start the morning ♥ He was so brave! We arrived at Spezia's at the exact same moment as my parents, so he got the tough ones over with right away (including Gramma Bunnie). He and Ed were off in the corner of the lobby for a while - warms my heart! I wish I had a social sense of propriety with photo taking... I'm so sorry I don't have pictures of all of us enjoying our time together. It was weird, though I felt an eerie calm all day. The poor restaurant wasn't ready for us and when they were in the midst of their whining, I plunked down the urn and nothing more was said ;) We were the happiest, most grateful mourning bunch they'd ever served! The weather was so typically South Dakotan, blustery and beautiful snow... snow that continued into today, mid afternoon; snow that meant we were virtually alone in the restaurant! Scotty and Eric got to catch up; Hayden had a great time with his friends and was especially happy to see Tena's girls; 
I got to talk "pregnant sexy mama" with Adam over a cigarette (I'm not kidding see that picture!?); I think I'm gonna give the wooby to their daughter instead of the raffle; my dad was especially affectionate (and I'm forevermore grateful!), even sharing the love with Tena (who's dad transitioned three years ago this month) to the point they were both in tears, human evolution at its finest; I'm so glad to have Hannah's flowers, I see them as just *bursting* like Hannah always was, and obviously still is ::g:: there are fuzzy bits mixed in and I like them too, like tickly spots; I came home and gorged on my gift of chocolate, snuggled once again with Scotty and enjoyed a glorious nap! Eli took over Hayden entertainment (not a terrific challenge with H on the day shift lately) beginning after Lunch ~ so very nice for me! Elizabeth didn't want to come to the meal, too overwhelming... I've reassured her and gifted her with the other bouquet of flowers for her own comfort. Alex, who expresses his emotions in incredibly complex ways, has made sure I know he's available to me for any of my kid-lovin needs ::bg:: We hung out for quite a while this morning ~ he was blessed with free reign of Scotty's laptop, the happiest kid in the universe, right here, in my house!!
While Hayden occupied Eli and Scotty ran off to set up for playing, I chicked myself out (including make-up, oh yeah, even the expensive kind!) and was sure to abide by the "Hannah's Mama" standards required by the occasion! I think I was pretty cute :) I got to see the entire Wumpus show, with Lisa and Brian (who left Philip to be entertained by Eli and Hayden, to their great delight!) and later joined by Tena and Amy. It was fun and bubbly and silly and intimidating and encouraging and, yeah, a diana experience :)
The weather was continuing and the plows came by regularly... at midnight, L&B gave out and set out for home, missing the end of Sleepeater, Scotty's favorite local band; they've actually listened to them for a couple of years. Oh, not the last connection of the evening!! Lisa asks me questions when they pick me up and whaddaya know? She knows Scotty's ex-wife, went to school with her, even with to Scotty and Sharon's wedding reception; she has pictures of young Scotty, with curly blonde hair ~ I can't wait to see them :)
And of course, as I was meeting band members for the first time, Amy was seeing old friends, yeah members of Wumpus know this one guy who knows this one chick that we both know, who happens to be a good friend of Amy's and Amy's hung out with the lot of them, a couple of years ago anyway...
Hangin' with the girls as a threesome was as amazing as it always is... there's some way cool, Karmic Majik aflowin' in each others' presence. Amy dropped me at home, I dropped in the yard, for their entertainment and made a big ol' snow angel in the middle of our pristine snow cover!! So fun!
The weather was prohibitive of a Scotty visit last night...
Tonight Hayden was just in too much need of his mommy for a Scotty visit... he very kindly and quietly he picked up and went home, which immediately lowered the Boy's stress level (now he really thinks Scotty's a nice guy ~ no guilt involved) and I made a pleasant evening for the two of us, watching My Super Ex-Girlfriend and we truly enjoying some time without the overwhelming banner of Hannahversary. He passed out and I get the luxury of internet connection and solitude ~ aaaaahhhhh! a much needed appointment ;)
I miss my kid. I'm moving much closer to Gratitude than I've ever been in my Life, it's an adventure I know I'll Love.
****Who did I miss? It seems the tables were waaaay bigger than this... but maybe not??****
Scotty, Eric, Griffin, Mel, Norah, DeLila, Ed, Joyce, Eli, Adam, Trisha, DeAnna, Susan, Emma, Tena, Me.
Cheyenne, Gabby, Detrain, Derald, Crystal, Bunnie, Donna, Bruce, Liz, Will, Karna, Troy, Darla, Penny, Calvin, Lexi, Hayden.
I got to talk "pregnant sexy mama" with Adam over a cigarette (I'm not kidding see that picture!?); I think I'm gonna give the wooby to their daughter instead of the raffle; my dad was especially affectionate (and I'm forevermore grateful!), even sharing the love with Tena (who's dad transitioned three years ago this month) to the point they were both in tears, human evolution at its finest; I'm so glad to have Hannah's flowers, I see them as just *bursting* like Hannah always was, and obviously still is ::g:: there are fuzzy bits mixed in and I like them too, like tickly spots; I came home and gorged on my gift of chocolate, snuggled once again with Scotty and enjoyed a glorious nap! Eli took over Hayden entertainment (not a terrific challenge with H on the day shift lately) beginning after Lunch ~ so very nice for me! Elizabeth didn't want to come to the meal, too overwhelming... I've reassured her and gifted her with the other bouquet of flowers for her own comfort. Alex, who expresses his emotions in incredibly complex ways, has made sure I know he's available to me for any of my kid-lovin needs ::bg:: We hung out for quite a while this morning ~ he was blessed with free reign of Scotty's laptop, the happiest kid in the universe, right here, in my house!! While Hayden occupied Eli and Scotty ran off to set up for playing, I chicked myself out (including make-up, oh yeah, even the expensive kind!) and was sure to abide by the "Hannah's Mama" standards required by the occasion! I think I was pretty cute :) I got to see the entire Wumpus show, with Lisa and Brian (who left Philip to be entertained by Eli and Hayden, to their great delight!) and later joined by Tena and Amy. It was fun and bubbly and silly and intimidating and encouraging and, yeah, a diana experience :)
The weather was continuing and the plows came by regularly... at midnight, L&B gave out and set out for home, missing the end of Sleepeater, Scotty's favorite local band; they've actually listened to them for a couple of years. Oh, not the last connection of the evening!! Lisa asks me questions when they pick me up and whaddaya know? She knows Scotty's ex-wife, went to school with her, even with to Scotty and Sharon's wedding reception; she has pictures of young Scotty, with curly blonde hair ~ I can't wait to see them :)
And of course, as I was meeting band members for the first time, Amy was seeing old friends, yeah members of Wumpus know this one guy who knows this one chick that we both know, who happens to be a good friend of Amy's and Amy's hung out with the lot of them, a couple of years ago anyway...
Hangin' with the girls as a threesome was as amazing as it always is... there's some way cool, Karmic Majik aflowin' in each others' presence. Amy dropped me at home, I dropped in the yard, for their entertainment and made a big ol' snow angel in the middle of our pristine snow cover!! So fun!
The weather was prohibitive of a Scotty visit last night...
Tonight Hayden was just in too much need of his mommy for a Scotty visit... he very kindly and quietly he picked up and went home, which immediately lowered the Boy's stress level (now he really thinks Scotty's a nice guy ~ no guilt involved) and I made a pleasant evening for the two of us, watching My Super Ex-Girlfriend and we truly enjoying some time without the overwhelming banner of Hannahversary. He passed out and I get the luxury of internet connection and solitude ~ aaaaahhhhh! a much needed appointment ;)
I miss my kid. I'm moving much closer to Gratitude than I've ever been in my Life, it's an adventure I know I'll Love.
****Who did I miss? It seems the tables were waaaay bigger than this... but maybe not??****
Scotty, Eric, Griffin, Mel, Norah, DeLila, Ed, Joyce, Eli, Adam, Trisha, DeAnna, Susan, Emma, Tena, Me.
Cheyenne, Gabby, Detrain, Derald, Crystal, Bunnie, Donna, Bruce, Liz, Will, Karna, Troy, Darla, Penny, Calvin, Lexi, Hayden.
Friday, February 23, 2007
Niagara Falls
One free kid. A healer, a master; my daughter, the goddess spark incarnate. Her father's daughter. Her brother's big sister. My gift from all the stars that aligned for every twist of fate required for her human existence with me. I always knew she was not mine alone. She created family; a much bigger one than I imagined. Our first conference vacation... the ripples are still being felt, our family continues to expand. Life goes on... and Good Life goes on... We always knew it was (is) a blessing to be here now, together.♥ If I had a flower for each time I thought of you, I could walk an eternity in my garden. (thanks Kel!)
♥ Music to cry by: Yesterday the Beatles
why she had to go? I don't know she wouldn't say...
♥ Music to dry tears by: Puff the Magic Dragon, reggae version
...and frolicked in the Autumn mist with a girl named Hannah Lea...
******
I'm not just any old rock, I'm the rock that withstands Niagara Falls - I just decided. When the water rushes over me, it makes rainbows. And gets everyone wet - bonus!
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Gemini Grief 101
♥ I'm going to burst! Methinks my soul is taking this bodhicitta thing a bit too far :) I'm open, I am; I know I need to be open to the uncomfortable stuff, so as to be open to the comfy stuff. I wanna and I don't.
♥ I'm crying and it feels really good; tonight's Grey's Anatomy helped (even if you don't regularly watch it, you should watch this week's episode - 'twill rock your world, I know, 'cause you're my loyal reader & you'll get why it touched me so... get the Kleenex ready)
♥ Today's first text message: So. Very. Happy.
Why? because we slept in my bed, holding hands and snuggled up. It was sweet and romantic; Soul soothing and inspiring. He loves my green and blue striped hanna andersson Lovejoy jammies :D Bed rental payment - a foot rub!! oh yeah! mmm my hands too!
The resulting haiku - by me:
So very happy
Our amazing connection
Leaves no need for dreams.
♥ I got a really special card in the mail today! Airmail!!! :::happy dance::: Linnea and Schuyler made me a beautiful *diana* card from shoe scraps :D I needed your words again today, you are indeed my Soul sister and I can't wait to hug you!! I'm adding it to my knapsack purse with Kelli's (and the rest of the stack!)~ it's like pulling you guys out whenever I need you!
♥ For Hayden today:
♥ I got to love on the pregnant chickie today, Trisha! I talked to the baby and told her how cool it is to be a Gemini and May 27 is a great birthday :D Trish is glowing, beautiful and full and soft and round... it's an amazing metamorphosis ♥
♥ I miss Hannah's voice. Shelly has a DVD for me, I've not wanted to see and here I find myself longing for it... think I'll pick it up tomorrow.
♥ Howard should be put back together in the next week or so... aaaahhh!
♥ Mitch is sending an ice storm for the weekend. I'm not sure what kind of message that is. It's sure not helping me want to forgive him. Especially if it means Kelli's family can't come!
♥ I'm gonna sleep tonight and it's really okay that when I wake up it will be tomorrow.
♥ I'm crying and it feels really good; tonight's Grey's Anatomy helped (even if you don't regularly watch it, you should watch this week's episode - 'twill rock your world, I know, 'cause you're my loyal reader & you'll get why it touched me so... get the Kleenex ready)
♥ Today's first text message: So. Very. Happy.
Why? because we slept in my bed, holding hands and snuggled up. It was sweet and romantic; Soul soothing and inspiring. He loves my green and blue striped hanna andersson Lovejoy jammies :D Bed rental payment - a foot rub!! oh yeah! mmm my hands too!
The resulting haiku - by me:
So very happy
Our amazing connection
Leaves no need for dreams.
♥ I got a really special card in the mail today! Airmail!!! :::happy dance::: Linnea and Schuyler made me a beautiful *diana* card from shoe scraps :D I needed your words again today, you are indeed my Soul sister and I can't wait to hug you!! I'm adding it to my knapsack purse with Kelli's (and the rest of the stack!)~ it's like pulling you guys out whenever I need you!
♥ For Hayden today:
Hayden's half birthday
three thousand one hundred days
his life, our blessing
~Scotty
three thousand one hundred days
his life, our blessing
~Scotty
♥ I got to love on the pregnant chickie today, Trisha! I talked to the baby and told her how cool it is to be a Gemini and May 27 is a great birthday :D Trish is glowing, beautiful and full and soft and round... it's an amazing metamorphosis ♥♥ I miss Hannah's voice. Shelly has a DVD for me, I've not wanted to see and here I find myself longing for it... think I'll pick it up tomorrow.
♥ Howard should be put back together in the next week or so... aaaahhh!
♥ Mitch is sending an ice storm for the weekend. I'm not sure what kind of message that is. It's sure not helping me want to forgive him. Especially if it means Kelli's family can't come!
♥ I'm gonna sleep tonight and it's really okay that when I wake up it will be tomorrow.
Music for Your Heart & Soul
I participated in the Imagination Tribe's Heart & Soul CD exchange... The timing of the trade had great influence on what I chose, a very diana's grieving while maintaining her diananess mix, if I do say so myself :) Today, my friend sent the sweetest comment I told her I wanted to listen to it and put some of the songs on the IPod and she said...."You'll want to put them all on!" So I'm listening to your CD right now. I sat right down and wrote out why I picked the songs I did and what they mean to me, Heart & Soul, right now... Here's my list (and yeah, I'll get ya yer own copy if you want!)
1- 60B (e-town theme) from the Elizabethtown Soundtrack: my favoritest movie and the sweetest song, for me it represents all of the passed-by exits, all the turns not taken, and the joy of the journey on the chosen path. Cameron Crowe is married to Nancy Wilson (of Heart), she wrote that little diddy for the movie as her hubby described it to her!
2- Universe & U - KT Tunstall: All is right in Life when you and the universe are on the same team!
3- Lady behind the mask - Bonnie Bluhm: I was "introduced" to Bonnie by an ABQ unschooler. Bonnie's album is dedicated to her son, who transitioned from her life at a very young age. This song accurately represents the feelings of a grieving mama, me! I can't wait to meet her for real!
4- It'll all work out - Tom Pettty: from the Elizabethtown Soundtrack - Tom's voice is so calming in any form, but this song brings me GREAT comfort when I think of how things always do work out eventually & I always imagine the song is about Hannah and Mitch (Better off with him, than here with me...)
5- Io (this time around) - again from e-town! : This is for that eternal question: What if *this* is it?? If this *is* indeed our one chance at life, then Life better sound like this song!! Better yet, what if This Time Around is just practice for Next Time? You can be anyone!
6- The Reason - Hoobastank: Unschooling anthem at it's finest AND a great song to sing to yourSelf, Be your own Reason!
7- Wide Sky Life - Amy Steinberg: A very diana song, a very empowering and makin' ya glad to be human song; I've got a Wide Sky Life!! Amy is the musical muse of my heart and soul, she sings my story in every tune!
8- Give me Novocaine - Green Day: As upbeat and optimistic as I am, some days I just want to get thru life medicated!! To open one's Self to feeling anything means one must be open to feeling everything and sometimes that's way overwhelming!
9- Hallelujah - Shrek Soundtrack - again: so diana in it's message: circumstances don't matter, I'm a-gonna sing my hallelujahs!
10- Shut up and Smile - Bowling for Soup: Life really *is* this easy sometimes: Ice cream & a hug :) Hayden once called this the perfect daddy song: all we need is Love and Beer.
11- Just a Girl - No Doubt: Hannah's song!! Warms my heart and soul, knowing she's not the domesticated chick being sung about... (and maybe, just maaaaaybe she's been reincarnated as Gwen's kid!)
12- I'm so Special - Amy Steinberg: Sometimes all I need to do is to get the hell outta my own way!!
13- Learning How to Smile - Everclear: I'm just learning how to fall and get back up again!
14- Sweet Jane - Cowboy Junkies: the eternal human quandary of the lessons our hearts lead us to and through... Also makes me think of Sweet Jayn Coburn, I imagine her as the little unschooler inside me!
15- Say Goodbye - Girlyman: I'm all too well-rehearsed... I wish I could be so melodic in my expressions :) My heart and soul just aren't the same since saying (hello &) goodbye to Mitch
16- Carry On - Tim McGraw: Okay, I'll say it, this guy is HOT, HOT, HOT!! And he's married to the totally HOT, amazing, wonderful Faith Hill.... oh, and he sings real purty, too :) Again, a very diana anthem! What's a happy alternative to carrying on? I haven't found one!
17- Through the Dark - KT Tunstall: THROUGH, not over, not around - straight through and on the other side awaits the joy of newfound Light!
18- Skyline Pigeon - Elton John: It wouldn't be a diana mix without my Boy! He sang this song to Ryan White and lyrics are inscribed on Ryan's headstone... I played it for both Mitch and Hannah when they left, it's my wishes for their soul-full freedom :)
-I put the next two songs on for Hayden. It warms a mama's heart when the son puts Greatest Day on repeat and carries it as his personal anthem!
19- Good Riddance (Time of your life) - Green Day: All the times are the Time of Your Life; Now is what you got, whatcha gonna do with it?
20- Greatest Day - Bowling for Soup: May every day be your greatest day!!
1- 60B (e-town theme) from the Elizabethtown Soundtrack: my favoritest movie and the sweetest song, for me it represents all of the passed-by exits, all the turns not taken, and the joy of the journey on the chosen path. Cameron Crowe is married to Nancy Wilson (of Heart), she wrote that little diddy for the movie as her hubby described it to her!
2- Universe & U - KT Tunstall: All is right in Life when you and the universe are on the same team!
3- Lady behind the mask - Bonnie Bluhm: I was "introduced" to Bonnie by an ABQ unschooler. Bonnie's album is dedicated to her son, who transitioned from her life at a very young age. This song accurately represents the feelings of a grieving mama, me! I can't wait to meet her for real!
4- It'll all work out - Tom Pettty: from the Elizabethtown Soundtrack - Tom's voice is so calming in any form, but this song brings me GREAT comfort when I think of how things always do work out eventually & I always imagine the song is about Hannah and Mitch (Better off with him, than here with me...)
5- Io (this time around) - again from e-town! : This is for that eternal question: What if *this* is it?? If this *is* indeed our one chance at life, then Life better sound like this song!! Better yet, what if This Time Around is just practice for Next Time? You can be anyone!
6- The Reason - Hoobastank: Unschooling anthem at it's finest AND a great song to sing to yourSelf, Be your own Reason!
7- Wide Sky Life - Amy Steinberg: A very diana song, a very empowering and makin' ya glad to be human song; I've got a Wide Sky Life!! Amy is the musical muse of my heart and soul, she sings my story in every tune!
8- Give me Novocaine - Green Day: As upbeat and optimistic as I am, some days I just want to get thru life medicated!! To open one's Self to feeling anything means one must be open to feeling everything and sometimes that's way overwhelming!
9- Hallelujah - Shrek Soundtrack - again: so diana in it's message: circumstances don't matter, I'm a-gonna sing my hallelujahs!
10- Shut up and Smile - Bowling for Soup: Life really *is* this easy sometimes: Ice cream & a hug :) Hayden once called this the perfect daddy song: all we need is Love and Beer.
11- Just a Girl - No Doubt: Hannah's song!! Warms my heart and soul, knowing she's not the domesticated chick being sung about... (and maybe, just maaaaaybe she's been reincarnated as Gwen's kid!)
12- I'm so Special - Amy Steinberg: Sometimes all I need to do is to get the hell outta my own way!!
13- Learning How to Smile - Everclear: I'm just learning how to fall and get back up again!
14- Sweet Jane - Cowboy Junkies: the eternal human quandary of the lessons our hearts lead us to and through... Also makes me think of Sweet Jayn Coburn, I imagine her as the little unschooler inside me!
15- Say Goodbye - Girlyman: I'm all too well-rehearsed... I wish I could be so melodic in my expressions :) My heart and soul just aren't the same since saying (hello &) goodbye to Mitch
16- Carry On - Tim McGraw: Okay, I'll say it, this guy is HOT, HOT, HOT!! And he's married to the totally HOT, amazing, wonderful Faith Hill.... oh, and he sings real purty, too :) Again, a very diana anthem! What's a happy alternative to carrying on? I haven't found one!
17- Through the Dark - KT Tunstall: THROUGH, not over, not around - straight through and on the other side awaits the joy of newfound Light!
18- Skyline Pigeon - Elton John: It wouldn't be a diana mix without my Boy! He sang this song to Ryan White and lyrics are inscribed on Ryan's headstone... I played it for both Mitch and Hannah when they left, it's my wishes for their soul-full freedom :)
-I put the next two songs on for Hayden. It warms a mama's heart when the son puts Greatest Day on repeat and carries it as his personal anthem!
19- Good Riddance (Time of your life) - Green Day: All the times are the Time of Your Life; Now is what you got, whatcha gonna do with it?
20- Greatest Day - Bowling for Soup: May every day be your greatest day!!
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
This is the reaction I was going for: That was just wonderful. Your cd was the first one I listened to and all of the songs I just FELT!!! And I loved them and I am glad you wrote out why you chose the songs you did (after hearing your story on the lists and seeing the beautiful quilt, I would cry to some of the songs and not really know why, and then I realized it is because I “knew” you and I could just FEEL the songs). Thank you, they really touched MY heart & soul, too!!Wednesday, February 21, 2007
My Lover Style
The Liberated Lover
59% partner focus, 61% aggressiveness, 90% adventurousness
Based on the results of this test, it is highly likely that:
You prefer your romance and love to wild and daring rather than typical or boring, you would rather pursue than be pursued and, when it comes to physical love, your satisfaction comes more from providing a wonderful time to your partner than simply seeking your own.
This places you in the Lover Style of: The Liberated Lover.
The Liberated Lover is a wonderful Lover Style, and forms the kind of free-thinking, sexually-exciting, self-confident lover that society once condemned but that a liberal-mind cherishes and exults. The Liberated Lover is a treasure to find, though it can sometimes be difficult to do so because they are often already engaged in relationships or are in high-demand if "in the market."
In terms of physical love, the Liberated Lover is possibly the most thrilling and demanding of all, with the one potential drawback being that it is possible to feel 'overmatched' at times by their prowess and selfless giving. Given trust and understanding, and the right lover, the Liberated Lover can be a delight in bed.
Best Compatibility can probably be found with: The Exotic Lover (most of all) or the Carnal Lover, or the Suave Lover.
Congratulations!
Thanks Again! -- THE LOVER STYLE PROFILE TEST
My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
59% partner focus, 61% aggressiveness, 90% adventurousness
Based on the results of this test, it is highly likely that:
You prefer your romance and love to wild and daring rather than typical or boring, you would rather pursue than be pursued and, when it comes to physical love, your satisfaction comes more from providing a wonderful time to your partner than simply seeking your own.
This places you in the Lover Style of: The Liberated Lover.
The Liberated Lover is a wonderful Lover Style, and forms the kind of free-thinking, sexually-exciting, self-confident lover that society once condemned but that a liberal-mind cherishes and exults. The Liberated Lover is a treasure to find, though it can sometimes be difficult to do so because they are often already engaged in relationships or are in high-demand if "in the market."
In terms of physical love, the Liberated Lover is possibly the most thrilling and demanding of all, with the one potential drawback being that it is possible to feel 'overmatched' at times by their prowess and selfless giving. Given trust and understanding, and the right lover, the Liberated Lover can be a delight in bed.
Best Compatibility can probably be found with: The Exotic Lover (most of all) or the Carnal Lover, or the Suave Lover.
Congratulations!
Thanks Again! -- THE LOVER STYLE PROFILE TEST
My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 99% on partner focus
You scored higher than 99% on aggressiveness
You scored higher than 99% on adventurousnes
The gifts are worth it
Whirling and swirling 'round my brain today...
the highest right, the internal, instinctive guidance system for the ferrets in Curious Lives... and how that connects to The Secret and the meter for our feelings... and how that connects to the House of Contracts in The Journey Home... and random thoughts of gifts and exchanges and agreements and karma and perspective... acceptance: forgiveness and gratitude...
and such sage advice from the stars today: Although you want to be socially involved, today it's difficult to tell others what you need. That's fine, for keeping conversations on the lighter side now will likely work out for the best. Otherwise, you can become so overly demanding that you won't get anything at all. Turning down your volume and sense of urgency makes sense.
...sounds good to me!
the highest right, the internal, instinctive guidance system for the ferrets in Curious Lives... and how that connects to The Secret and the meter for our feelings... and how that connects to the House of Contracts in The Journey Home... and random thoughts of gifts and exchanges and agreements and karma and perspective... acceptance: forgiveness and gratitude...
and such sage advice from the stars today: Although you want to be socially involved, today it's difficult to tell others what you need. That's fine, for keeping conversations on the lighter side now will likely work out for the best. Otherwise, you can become so overly demanding that you won't get anything at all. Turning down your volume and sense of urgency makes sense.
...sounds good to me!
Haiku Heaven
We can't come to gym
new furnace installation
say hi to the gang.
~Mel
A kind man you are
When you listen to me rave
Thanks for being you.
~Me
New inspiration
The sacred feminine shines
from deep within you.
~Scotty
The gifts are sublime
Your words speak straight to my soul,
Magic is afoot.
~Me
new furnace installation
say hi to the gang.
~Mel
A kind man you are
When you listen to me rave
Thanks for being you.
~Me
New inspiration
The sacred feminine shines
from deep within you.
~Scotty
The gifts are sublime
Your words speak straight to my soul,
Magic is afoot.
~Me
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
The Journey Home
one of my all-time, makin' sense of the universe, heart soothing, soul inspiring, most favorite, sacred books. I ordered two from Amazon; one to loan. I know it's appearance today is a blessing, I ♥ divine timing. Just holding the book, I am filled with the memories of the lessons therein, anticipation for reuniting with the Michael Thomas in me, inspiration already!************
It's a parable about everyman (as in every HUman) and the journey of Life... if one has one, that is! Existence vs Living? There's a big difference between being alive with a heartbeat and truly, deeply BEing Alive, having a Life, your heart and soul a-singing. What makes one life more joyful than another? We carry with us intrinsic lessons/gifts for ourselves and others we meet along our path; every encounter is an exchange of gifts, of knowledge, of experience of what it means to be human. One can become open to those gifts when Gratitude is deep; when we uncover, utilize, strengthen, and OWN the tools of perspective at hand, our Journey Home is easier; no matter how rocky our road. Home. Isn't it a comfortable word? We can manifest those ideals of Home in our here and now, to carry inside with us where ever we go - We are Home!
A book with Namaste at it's heart.
I can't wait to curl up; can you tell?
I am Brave
Gemini: Truth or dare? You'll take both -- and a double-dog dare while you're at it. You're fearless when it comes to getting a new venture off the ground or discussing a matter that everyone else is too scared to bring up. -midco.com
Gemini: The edginess is settling down and you are thankful that your world seems like a more relaxed place, but this doesn't mean you are slacking. Although you may not be as motivated today, you still can become overly enthusiastic for a short duration. The idea of beginning a project might sound like a good idea, but you may not have sufficient energy to follow through and make it happen. -tarot.com
Gemini: The edginess is settling down and you are thankful that your world seems like a more relaxed place, but this doesn't mean you are slacking. Although you may not be as motivated today, you still can become overly enthusiastic for a short duration. The idea of beginning a project might sound like a good idea, but you may not have sufficient energy to follow through and make it happen. -tarot.com
Monday, February 19, 2007
Like I needed another reason...
Midday Haiku:
I just kissed a girl!
When I open the car's door,
Her scent still lingers.
When I open the car's door,
Her scent still lingers.
~scotty
Never underestimate your own power!
Gemini: You are interested in discovering what drives others to seek power at work or in love. You may be ready to delve into the intense world of hidden feelings, a place that you often avoid. Now, however, you are willing to overcome your resistance, even if you are not comfortable with the thought of what's ahead. You are on the right track, for you will surely feel relief once you know the truth.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Aaaaaaaaalready a great day! We got some respite from our gloomy enclave to venture out to shop... with Scotty :) So very nice of him to postpone his well-deserved nap to schlep us around to entertain him! It was nice to have another person there to talk my ideas through with... Hayden wanted to buy a cheezy card reader, on clearance for $15; he left it with me and went back to the toy dept, so I had a few moments to decide my strategy for imparting some "buyer beware" wisdom about this purchase; it was a rare treat to turn to Scotty and admit this is one of those times I'm really at a loss for how to meet my goal of autonomy for Hayden and his giftcard while avoiding the inevitable sadness over a regretted purchase; I talked through all my concerns, so when Hayden approached, I was able to share those with him, without making a value judgment about his choice (Do you like X-men? What happens when they stop making booster packs? How much are the booster packs? $4 eek! Should we be suspicious that it's on clearance?), he had already set his sights on a Tamagachi (which he already knows the entertainment value of...) and a set of NintenDogs trading cards. Next, we shopped for used video games... didn't find anything he really wanted... at the last minute, he grabbed a Grand Theft Auto game and decided he wanted it; I was torn! Are you asking for the game because I said I would buy you one and you don't want to leave with nothing? OR is this really a game you want? The GTA games we already own don't get played very often... Hayden was initially mad at me, but soon realized that the promise of a video game really IS better postponed and used on a game he really, really wants, instead of settling for yet another one he won't play. At the end of the conversation, Hayden was walking ahead of us and I sighed and said, "My tongue is bloody from biting back the moral objections I have to that game, I'm glad it was resolved without having to go there!" Sometimes it's so exhausting to do such mental dancework, I imagine it's really exhausting for someone outside of this lifestyle to watch!
Scotty happily returned us home and is on his way to dreamland :)
Peace has once again settled into our lives.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Aaaaaaaaalready a great day! We got some respite from our gloomy enclave to venture out to shop... with Scotty :) So very nice of him to postpone his well-deserved nap to schlep us around to entertain him! It was nice to have another person there to talk my ideas through with... Hayden wanted to buy a cheezy card reader, on clearance for $15; he left it with me and went back to the toy dept, so I had a few moments to decide my strategy for imparting some "buyer beware" wisdom about this purchase; it was a rare treat to turn to Scotty and admit this is one of those times I'm really at a loss for how to meet my goal of autonomy for Hayden and his giftcard while avoiding the inevitable sadness over a regretted purchase; I talked through all my concerns, so when Hayden approached, I was able to share those with him, without making a value judgment about his choice (Do you like X-men? What happens when they stop making booster packs? How much are the booster packs? $4 eek! Should we be suspicious that it's on clearance?), he had already set his sights on a Tamagachi (which he already knows the entertainment value of...) and a set of NintenDogs trading cards. Next, we shopped for used video games... didn't find anything he really wanted... at the last minute, he grabbed a Grand Theft Auto game and decided he wanted it; I was torn! Are you asking for the game because I said I would buy you one and you don't want to leave with nothing? OR is this really a game you want? The GTA games we already own don't get played very often... Hayden was initially mad at me, but soon realized that the promise of a video game really IS better postponed and used on a game he really, really wants, instead of settling for yet another one he won't play. At the end of the conversation, Hayden was walking ahead of us and I sighed and said, "My tongue is bloody from biting back the moral objections I have to that game, I'm glad it was resolved without having to go there!" Sometimes it's so exhausting to do such mental dancework, I imagine it's really exhausting for someone outside of this lifestyle to watch!
Scotty happily returned us home and is on his way to dreamland :)
Peace has once again settled into our lives.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
The cards in my hands...
Judgment
May you receive what you had lost.
Deck: Goddess [card art © US Games]
What has traditionally been known as the Judgement card, sometimes entitled Resurrection, represents the great reunion that the ancients believed would happen once in every age. This was the time when souls are harvested and taken Home to their place of origin, outside the solar system. Then the World is seeded with a batch of new souls and the process starts over.
>From a modern point of view, this great reunion -- which includes every personality that you have ever been and every soul that you have done deep work with -- reunites to consciously complete the process. In a way, we symbolically celebrate this returning to center every year on our birthday.
In personal terms, the Judgment cards points to freedom from inner conflicts, and so clear a channel, that the buried talents and gifts of past incarnations can come through an individual in this lifetime. This card counsels you to trust the process of opening yourself, because what emerges is of consistently high quality. You can effortlessly manifest as a multi-dimensional being, and assist in evoking that response from others.
>From a modern point of view, this great reunion -- which includes every personality that you have ever been and every soul that you have done deep work with -- reunites to consciously complete the process. In a way, we symbolically celebrate this returning to center every year on our birthday.
In personal terms, the Judgment cards points to freedom from inner conflicts, and so clear a channel, that the buried talents and gifts of past incarnations can come through an individual in this lifetime. This card counsels you to trust the process of opening yourself, because what emerges is of consistently high quality. You can effortlessly manifest as a multi-dimensional being, and assist in evoking that response from others.
and so are the days of her life...
This whole new thing is so fun, I can't eat, I can't stop smiling, I'm constantly tingly, I keep my bed cleared off at all times ::bg:: Cool bonus: In Scotty's absence, I make sure to have extra 1:1 time with the Boy, so he's more comfortable when S's here. My willingness to attend him while I've got company is a boost to him, as well...
It really is a pleasure to date a self proclaimed slacker, as he just loves to hang out with us. Last night we got to watch two movies! I picked Hitch, 'cause it's the very best Valentine movie :) I forgot how much it focused on first kisses and the female psychology there about :::blush::: We relinquished the living room and watched This is Spinal Tap on my bed (a luxury for the futon guy!) ... we snuggled and giggled and held hands and he managed to instigate a really sweet kiss ♥
We talked a little bit about my list of cities for new homes... I told him Hayden has nixed Corvallis (as it is too far from everything; we're quite used to being a day's drive from anywhere we want to be!) and I'm not really sure where we'll land (my moving muse has made way for grief)... hanging around Sioux Falls for a while longer isn't the worst case scenario. It may have been this conversation that earned me the kiss ;) There's some strange foreshadowing here in my blog like this on the day before I met Scotty, or this one (note the picture!).
I will land exactly where I'm supposed to land. The gift of Bodhicitta means I have no attachment or value judgment of my new home, mere gratitude is enough - and I got loads of that!!
****
S: Your aura shines bright and hot, yellow and white... I'm so very happy we've met :)
me: I am mystified by divine timing... for you I am just plain grateful.
****
He's carefully considering accompanying me to the luncheon on Saturday. Knowing Mel and Eric are attending helps, but he's not quite sure. (it'd be a gratitude party indeed!) How much of a hard sell can I give? I'm glad he's not taking the responsibility lightly ;) He'll be playing later that evening and I'm hoping to actually see them perform. And popping in to Jeanie's 40th year celebration concert at Cool Beans... All this joy! I'm glad to have room for it ;)
***
Okay, who's up to being my evening's chaperon?
It really is a pleasure to date a self proclaimed slacker, as he just loves to hang out with us. Last night we got to watch two movies! I picked Hitch, 'cause it's the very best Valentine movie :) I forgot how much it focused on first kisses and the female psychology there about :::blush::: We relinquished the living room and watched This is Spinal Tap on my bed (a luxury for the futon guy!) ... we snuggled and giggled and held hands and he managed to instigate a really sweet kiss ♥
We talked a little bit about my list of cities for new homes... I told him Hayden has nixed Corvallis (as it is too far from everything; we're quite used to being a day's drive from anywhere we want to be!) and I'm not really sure where we'll land (my moving muse has made way for grief)... hanging around Sioux Falls for a while longer isn't the worst case scenario. It may have been this conversation that earned me the kiss ;) There's some strange foreshadowing here in my blog like this on the day before I met Scotty, or this one (note the picture!).
I will land exactly where I'm supposed to land. The gift of Bodhicitta means I have no attachment or value judgment of my new home, mere gratitude is enough - and I got loads of that!!
****
S: Your aura shines bright and hot, yellow and white... I'm so very happy we've met :)
me: I am mystified by divine timing... for you I am just plain grateful.
****
He's carefully considering accompanying me to the luncheon on Saturday. Knowing Mel and Eric are attending helps, but he's not quite sure. (it'd be a gratitude party indeed!) How much of a hard sell can I give? I'm glad he's not taking the responsibility lightly ;) He'll be playing later that evening and I'm hoping to actually see them perform. And popping in to Jeanie's 40th year celebration concert at Cool Beans... All this joy! I'm glad to have room for it ;)
***
Okay, who's up to being my evening's chaperon?
Friday, February 16, 2007
Who should be my Valentine?
The guy who braves below freezing temps to pick up takeout from his favorite restaurant for the three of us to enjoy. The guy who has never seen a single episode of 24 and is willing to confront my Keifer fantasy and enjoy it with me - and who really didn't mind that it didn't happen last night. The guy who doesn't sigh or become ruffled when the kids need my attention. The guy who happily snuggles up for an episode of South Park with Alex when my friend John calls me from Alaska. The guy who gets tears in his eyes when I mention Hannah. The guy who shared the message from a Beck song: Take your heart off the shelf, it's worth it. The guy who wonders aloud if *this* should be considered a date, as he's not taking me out anywhere nor spending money on minutiae (resounding response: If we're having fun, it's a date!). The guy who loves my cat and happily reminds me how much she loves me. The guy who received my ATC Valentines with the very appreciation I was shooting for!
The guy who sends text messages like this:
I enjoyed myself thoroughly last night; I can't wait until the next time! The phone in the glue - Elizabethtown. It was wonderful. Thank you.
Bon Soir, mme. How was Keifer? Hope you three had a warm, safe day :)
Our parallels are remarkable; I slept late after realizing I don't have class on Tues... Such lovely, delicious slack.
I want to eat more fatty foods and hibernate in your warm bedroom for the rest of the winter :)
The messages echo the film the other night :) (referring to E-town conversation between Kirstin and Orlando)
Thank you for the pleasure of your company :)
I'm sorry... Too much to drink, smell like smoke... rare for me. This is twice now- too much to drink while talking to you- I must re-examine! (I responded: rare for me, too... it generally takes much longer before I drive men to drink!)
I'm sorry... I'm such a lightweight... I just didn't want to be 'that guy' coming over late after beers. How was the film?
Life is good. Sleep thee well, m'lady.
R'eves plaisants, mme.
Confession time: you made a very special appearance in last night's dream... Nothing freaky, I promise ;)
I just want to say that you & H are absolutely wonderful; it's amazing to watch the two of you interact... Sleep in peace tonight :)
Why, pray tell, are you up so early? Some handsome young man keeping you occupied? ;)
Sleep well, mon cheri :) I haven't been someone's valentine in yeeears. Thanks 4 the early morning feel good!
Life IS good. Many thanks for the challah fr. toast... Amazing!!
I like beginnings, esp. new ones ;)
Pierogies, dolmas, borscht and meat on a stick. And Jack on the teevee. (And you! I responded)
A kiss at the door! I've been walking on air all morning and I can't imagine a more noble gift than that feeling. Thank you so much, D.
I'm so sorry, I just remembered what time it actually is. Grab Patches and go back to sleep. Another fantastic dream last night! (6:06 this morning)
...so much guilt. I've robbed you both of sleep. I directed my 1st show today :D
I'd love to show you sometime :D
*********************************************
I'm thinkin' this is the guy, the one who really does deserve to be my Valentine! loooooong after February is over....
The guy who sends text messages like this:
I enjoyed myself thoroughly last night; I can't wait until the next time! The phone in the glue - Elizabethtown. It was wonderful. Thank you.
Bon Soir, mme. How was Keifer? Hope you three had a warm, safe day :)
Our parallels are remarkable; I slept late after realizing I don't have class on Tues... Such lovely, delicious slack.
I want to eat more fatty foods and hibernate in your warm bedroom for the rest of the winter :)
The messages echo the film the other night :) (referring to E-town conversation between Kirstin and Orlando)
Thank you for the pleasure of your company :)
I'm sorry... Too much to drink, smell like smoke... rare for me. This is twice now- too much to drink while talking to you- I must re-examine! (I responded: rare for me, too... it generally takes much longer before I drive men to drink!)
I'm sorry... I'm such a lightweight... I just didn't want to be 'that guy' coming over late after beers. How was the film?
Life is good. Sleep thee well, m'lady.
R'eves plaisants, mme.
Confession time: you made a very special appearance in last night's dream... Nothing freaky, I promise ;)
I just want to say that you & H are absolutely wonderful; it's amazing to watch the two of you interact... Sleep in peace tonight :)
Why, pray tell, are you up so early? Some handsome young man keeping you occupied? ;)
Sleep well, mon cheri :) I haven't been someone's valentine in yeeears. Thanks 4 the early morning feel good!
Life IS good. Many thanks for the challah fr. toast... Amazing!!
I like beginnings, esp. new ones ;)
Pierogies, dolmas, borscht and meat on a stick. And Jack on the teevee. (And you! I responded)
A kiss at the door! I've been walking on air all morning and I can't imagine a more noble gift than that feeling. Thank you so much, D.
I'm so sorry, I just remembered what time it actually is. Grab Patches and go back to sleep. Another fantastic dream last night! (6:06 this morning)
...so much guilt. I've robbed you both of sleep. I directed my 1st show today :D
I'd love to show you sometime :D
*********************************************
I'm thinkin' this is the guy, the one who really does deserve to be my Valentine! loooooong after February is over....
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Today's Quote
It's a message... I went to Amazon and on my front page was Messiah's Handbook: Reminders for the Advanced Soul by Richard Bach. I'm poking around and click on "surprise me":
You chose us for you teachers?
We chose you, too!
You care about what you're learning?
We care, too!
You think we're in your life because you love us?
Can't you understand?
We love you, too!
We chose you, too!
You care about what you're learning?
We care, too!
You think we're in your life because you love us?
Can't you understand?
We love you, too!
It's in the Stars
Gemini: An unexpected development is really a fairy godmother wearing a cleverly impenetrable disguise. When you think about it, it dawns on you that not only is this what you really wanted all along, it's exactly what you need. (midco)
Gemini: Relief is arriving in the form of temporary freedom. Of course, you may never feel as free as you ultimately wish, but at least now some of the overbearing restrictions are lifting. Don't misuse this newfound gift by frittering your time away. If you can stay as focused as you were when the pressure was on, you'll accomplish more than you thought possible. (tarot.com)
Gemini: Relief is arriving in the form of temporary freedom. Of course, you may never feel as free as you ultimately wish, but at least now some of the overbearing restrictions are lifting. Don't misuse this newfound gift by frittering your time away. If you can stay as focused as you were when the pressure was on, you'll accomplish more than you thought possible. (tarot.com)
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Scotty who???
Alrighty, I'll tell the tale :)
I *found* him months ago on MySpace, he and I were the only non-spousal friends for Mel and Eric. I sent him a funny message about how I know how fussy they are about choosing friends and if he and I are on the list, then we should probably know each other. What I've come to know is he is Eric's buddy since adolescence, Scotty likes to say he gave Eric away at his wedding to Mel. Mel only had her wedding pictures to show me... from 12 years ago! We've been shooting little messages at each other, little flirtatious, but not really moving towards meeting, until...
He recently returned from a wild adventure in Europe and came home with lots of pictures. I told him I want to see the slide show before I move away, which lit a fire under both our asses. We met at a Wumpus concert (which I missed!) and he is the author of the "box of crayons" comment ♥ We did the slide show as our second meeting (when do they actually become dates?), which included a lot of coffee and a lot of wine, all on an empty stomach! Of course, I was so excited to be out with an adult male, I think I was dianaX1000 that night! We've yet to finish his tour pictures, but we've had wonderful touching times together... really, truly a sweet, sweet man!
He's the drummer in his band and he plays guitar :) He's tuned both our guitars and has inspired Hayden to start his own band (even offered to loan him equipment if he needs). Hayden and I will be attending an all-ages show later this month and in the meanwhile we'll listen to our Wumpus CD and enjoy his company as he's available... I'm glad he's here now, divinely timed!
I *found* him months ago on MySpace, he and I were the only non-spousal friends for Mel and Eric. I sent him a funny message about how I know how fussy they are about choosing friends and if he and I are on the list, then we should probably know each other. What I've come to know is he is Eric's buddy since adolescence, Scotty likes to say he gave Eric away at his wedding to Mel. Mel only had her wedding pictures to show me... from 12 years ago! We've been shooting little messages at each other, little flirtatious, but not really moving towards meeting, until...
He recently returned from a wild adventure in Europe and came home with lots of pictures. I told him I want to see the slide show before I move away, which lit a fire under both our asses. We met at a Wumpus concert (which I missed!) and he is the author of the "box of crayons" comment ♥ We did the slide show as our second meeting (when do they actually become dates?), which included a lot of coffee and a lot of wine, all on an empty stomach! Of course, I was so excited to be out with an adult male, I think I was dianaX1000 that night! We've yet to finish his tour pictures, but we've had wonderful touching times together... really, truly a sweet, sweet man!
He's the drummer in his band and he plays guitar :) He's tuned both our guitars and has inspired Hayden to start his own band (even offered to loan him equipment if he needs). Hayden and I will be attending an all-ages show later this month and in the meanwhile we'll listen to our Wumpus CD and enjoy his company as he's available... I'm glad he's here now, divinely timed!
Sweetheart
Another good reason for the DVR? Postponing my fantasy life for a real one! Monday night, we ordered pizza and were well blessed with another visit from Scotty. Distracting him, once again, from homework and sleep for an evening of Jenner Family Madness :::bg::: At the moment he arrived, the Boy and I were in the midst of some turmoil, which was hard to hold on to with our jovial company. We even got to all schlep out in the midst of a beautiful, fluffy snowstorm to hit the grocery store. In the parking lot, we saw a jeep with a "Life is good" wheel cover on the back; Hayden and I stood near it so Scott could take our picture :) 'twas very fun, with lots of laughter! He even sent a message after, "I just want to say that you and H are absolutely wonderful; it's amazing to watch the two of you interact... Sleep in peace tonight :)" I get this kind of wonderful text messages from him regularly, wishes for warm wonderful days and for peaceful sleep. I tell ya, he's a sweetheart!
*******************************
It's just plain strange to begin dating someone days before VD rolls around... there's so much societal pressure over this silly hallmark holiday (especially considering San Valentin was a priest!). Mayhap we'll just pretend the day is another ordinary day and celebrate tomorrow (have I mentioned how much I love 1/2 price chocolates?). I'm thinking an ATC is an appropriate Valentine gift... maybe I'll even stay up now and make him one :) He's waking up for work, right this minute, so I sent him a message, asking him to be my Valentine... his immediate response? Of course I will ;)
*******************************
It's just plain strange to begin dating someone days before VD rolls around... there's so much societal pressure over this silly hallmark holiday (especially considering San Valentin was a priest!). Mayhap we'll just pretend the day is another ordinary day and celebrate tomorrow (have I mentioned how much I love 1/2 price chocolates?). I'm thinking an ATC is an appropriate Valentine gift... maybe I'll even stay up now and make him one :) He's waking up for work, right this minute, so I sent him a message, asking him to be my Valentine... his immediate response? Of course I will ;)
Monday, February 12, 2007
The Good Aunt
My niece, Brittany, loves to be at my house. The largest appeal is that it's not her house, the second appeal is the seemingly limitless electronic options and a lack of punishment mentality.
I've spent some inordinate amount of time being stuck in negativity about this... then it was the memories of time spent in my aunts' homes, how that experience shaped me, that began my shift in perspective.
There is some angst in her relationship with Hayden. He loves having her around, truly enjoys having a playmate, but the school-think and the authoritarian family models she brings along are foreign to him and frustrate him greatly. An example, we were making Challah french toast
on Saturday and Brittany moved the frying pan and it burned Hayden's arm (unfortunately I was in the potty). She immediately denied burning him (aaarrgghh, the Blame Game) and he insisted he was, indeed, burned! Hayden was pretty worked up. I first took care of the burn, cool, running water helps all kinds of stresses, while speaking calmly, soothingly about responsibility, accepting responsibility and not placing blame; how hard it is for Brittany, who thought she'd be in trouble, to just deal with what happened - her fear of punishment (being sent home, I assume, or worse, not being invited to return) was blocking her ability to acknowledge his injury and avail herself to compassion. I'm reassuring him (she's standing 10 feet away) that inside she does feel bad, it's an icky feeling to have caused injury to someone, especially someone you care about... there was this shift, as we moved to get a dishtowel we began joking about intentional harm vs accidental harm and how a tiny burn like that one is obviously an accidental type, if you're willing to risk trouble, you may as well go all out for that... the little stuff ain't worth the effort (spiritually or emotionally) that punishment entails. We were all laughing and having a great time, just moments after major trauma.
However, by late Saturday night (and with all the nuttiness rolling around my own Self) I was done having such intense interventions at each conflict between the two of them... (Guitar Hero: who can play on who's band and how many songs for each turn and how many attempts at completion) I did have to finally say that if they absolutely can't figure out a compromise and listen to one another instead of only speaking their own minds, Brittany would have to go home. I felt horrible, but I knew I had to set my own limits, already stretched far too thin. She fell asleep long before Hayden, which availed him for our snuggling :)
She also awoke before him, on Sunday, which availed her for some time with me. We talked about the upcoming conferences. She asked if she could come with us on our April trip. (Hayden asked the day before about her coming to L&L and I patiently explained that it wasn't kind to bring her to an unschooling conference, as she has no chance of ever being unschooled herself and she has little understanding of the principles by which we live... it would be free, yes, but it would be overwhelming both for her to be there and for her to return home. It feels a bit neener, neener, neener to me. Plus, I'm not willing to commit to the negotiation work required for her to be safe and for me to be comfortable in this setting. (It's quite enough that I'm stretching my comfort to include my mother ♥) I talked about the length of the trip and her ability to get along with Hayden in our small spaces... I also mentioned the additional expense and how I really can't afford to feed her on the road for a month, let alone a trip to Disneyland. Though housing and travel don't cost any more to have another person in the car, food adds up waaaaay quick, especially over three weeks. She's welcome to come (LIFE Is Good is a much smaller version of L&L and is in a hotel I've already scoped out), though I doubt her mother will let her have that much time & distance away, plus I don't know if they can afford it.
She hung out on the computer all afternoon, happy to be alone (I'm sure there's not much privacy at her house, either) while I went out for coffee with Tony. Sunday was far more peaceful than Saturday had been. She later turned down the opportunity to go out to dinner with her family, just to eat food she really didn't like, just so she could meet Scotty :::bg::: When they called again to say they were on their way to pick her up, she began to whine and I called out, "Please leave happily!!" She took a deep breath and did just that.
********
When I got on the computer this morning, I noticed a light flashing on the printer... so I pushed the button and checked the que... there were many copies of a picture and just one other, so I canceled the copies and turned to the printer -- Oh Mon Dieu!! I'm now assured that Thai gay men just don't do it for me - eeeeeekkk!! Lots of deep breathing as I plan this conversation I'm gonna have to have with my Boy... I just can't grasp why he would go to these pages nor why he would print these pictures! I popped open the history list and quickly realized it was Brittany who had done this... I'm stopped in my tracks. I. Don't. Know. How. To. Deal. With. This. ::::deeeeeep breath:::: Trust. I guess I just gotta Trust that the wisdom I need will come to me at the moment I open this conversation.
I've spent some inordinate amount of time being stuck in negativity about this... then it was the memories of time spent in my aunts' homes, how that experience shaped me, that began my shift in perspective.
There is some angst in her relationship with Hayden. He loves having her around, truly enjoys having a playmate, but the school-think and the authoritarian family models she brings along are foreign to him and frustrate him greatly. An example, we were making Challah french toast
on Saturday and Brittany moved the frying pan and it burned Hayden's arm (unfortunately I was in the potty). She immediately denied burning him (aaarrgghh, the Blame Game) and he insisted he was, indeed, burned! Hayden was pretty worked up. I first took care of the burn, cool, running water helps all kinds of stresses, while speaking calmly, soothingly about responsibility, accepting responsibility and not placing blame; how hard it is for Brittany, who thought she'd be in trouble, to just deal with what happened - her fear of punishment (being sent home, I assume, or worse, not being invited to return) was blocking her ability to acknowledge his injury and avail herself to compassion. I'm reassuring him (she's standing 10 feet away) that inside she does feel bad, it's an icky feeling to have caused injury to someone, especially someone you care about... there was this shift, as we moved to get a dishtowel we began joking about intentional harm vs accidental harm and how a tiny burn like that one is obviously an accidental type, if you're willing to risk trouble, you may as well go all out for that... the little stuff ain't worth the effort (spiritually or emotionally) that punishment entails. We were all laughing and having a great time, just moments after major trauma.However, by late Saturday night (and with all the nuttiness rolling around my own Self) I was done having such intense interventions at each conflict between the two of them... (Guitar Hero: who can play on who's band and how many songs for each turn and how many attempts at completion) I did have to finally say that if they absolutely can't figure out a compromise and listen to one another instead of only speaking their own minds, Brittany would have to go home. I felt horrible, but I knew I had to set my own limits, already stretched far too thin. She fell asleep long before Hayden, which availed him for our snuggling :)
She also awoke before him, on Sunday, which availed her for some time with me. We talked about the upcoming conferences. She asked if she could come with us on our April trip. (Hayden asked the day before about her coming to L&L and I patiently explained that it wasn't kind to bring her to an unschooling conference, as she has no chance of ever being unschooled herself and she has little understanding of the principles by which we live... it would be free, yes, but it would be overwhelming both for her to be there and for her to return home. It feels a bit neener, neener, neener to me. Plus, I'm not willing to commit to the negotiation work required for her to be safe and for me to be comfortable in this setting. (It's quite enough that I'm stretching my comfort to include my mother ♥) I talked about the length of the trip and her ability to get along with Hayden in our small spaces... I also mentioned the additional expense and how I really can't afford to feed her on the road for a month, let alone a trip to Disneyland. Though housing and travel don't cost any more to have another person in the car, food adds up waaaaay quick, especially over three weeks. She's welcome to come (LIFE Is Good is a much smaller version of L&L and is in a hotel I've already scoped out), though I doubt her mother will let her have that much time & distance away, plus I don't know if they can afford it.
She hung out on the computer all afternoon, happy to be alone (I'm sure there's not much privacy at her house, either) while I went out for coffee with Tony. Sunday was far more peaceful than Saturday had been. She later turned down the opportunity to go out to dinner with her family, just to eat food she really didn't like, just so she could meet Scotty :::bg::: When they called again to say they were on their way to pick her up, she began to whine and I called out, "Please leave happily!!" She took a deep breath and did just that.
********
When I got on the computer this morning, I noticed a light flashing on the printer... so I pushed the button and checked the que... there were many copies of a picture and just one other, so I canceled the copies and turned to the printer -- Oh Mon Dieu!! I'm now assured that Thai gay men just don't do it for me - eeeeeekkk!! Lots of deep breathing as I plan this conversation I'm gonna have to have with my Boy... I just can't grasp why he would go to these pages nor why he would print these pictures! I popped open the history list and quickly realized it was Brittany who had done this... I'm stopped in my tracks. I. Don't. Know. How. To. Deal. With. This. ::::deeeeeep breath:::: Trust. I guess I just gotta Trust that the wisdom I need will come to me at the moment I open this conversation.
Morton Salt Girl
Some days....I finally got in touch with Tony yesterday, even honored with his presence for a few hours :) We planned to hang out at a coffeeshop, but many places were closed and the open shops were packed, so we got coffee to go, then drove around and talked. As always, it was amazing; comfortable and smooth.
Though, I was bi-polar the most of the day, either manic from lack of sleep and denial or depressed and ready for the marathon tear-fest that's a-comin' I knew either deep, full exhaustion or release were the options to getting a good night's sleep! And I just wasn't yet ready to cry it out...
I got back several books from him, including Illusions: The Tale of a Reluctant Messiah. While pondering sleep upon my return home, I picked it up and it opened to:
The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief
in injustice and tragedy.
What the caterpillar calls the end of the world,
the master calls a butterfly.
and as I ponder that thought and what it means to my grieving... I turn the page to:in injustice and tragedy.
What the caterpillar calls the end of the world,
the master calls a butterfly.
Don't be dismayed at good-byes.
A farewell is necessary before you can meet again.
And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes,
A farewell is necessary before you can meet again.
And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes,
is certain for those who are friends.
What amazing comfort, once again (as the book explains) from opening a book to a random page and finding the personal message contained therein. The book begins with a great story, including a great parable therein. The parable is about these creatures who cling because it's what they know; releasing and flowing with the current is unknown and surely dangerous, deadly even! One creature takes the risk, rolls with the current and sure enough, is beaten and banged as he seeks his way. Then he releases his emotional attachment to even that event and is amazingly lifted above the turmoil and is able to flow without obstacle. As he begins to share his journey, with those who can make the same choice as easily has he did, just let go, his message is missed as folks are more interested in the miracle of his freedom than the lessons of the easy possibility their own freedoms. He is made a messiah. Beautiful story; the rest of the book is equally amazing and filled with infinite wisdom. I read this book a few times a year for the past 16 years; ever since my amazing friend Dave Reed gave me a Richard Bach collection for my birthday... thanks!I pulled out of my reverie to make another delicious dinner. For Hannah, we had Alfredo pasta with chicken. Hayden jumped right in to the kitchen work; *just* like his daddy, loves to cook!
Drummer boy even came over to enjoy the bounty :) He also brought along some Iowa cigarettes (which he did feel guilty for bringing to me on such a monumental day, maybe he should have brought something more life affirming - but he did! himself) as well as some mama beer and, most importantly, great Soulful Comfort. Too bad he works ungodly hours, we coulda lounged on my bed for many more hours... it was aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhsome! I sent Illusions home with him to read :)
I was feeling peaceful and ready to get that much needed, restful sleep...
I got to wake up to a sweet text message and a happy, happy back-to-nights Boy :) Ya know, between the weird transition periods of understanding (which is really what grieving is, innnit?) there are these bright shiny joyful happy periods... for all of them I am grateful; today, however, I'm mostly grateful for the ones that feel good. ♥
helps that the moon tide has arrived... gonna clip my nails before putting the Keeper back in, however - ow!
Sunday, February 11, 2007
I'm still awake...
aarrgghh!! I've had the damnedest time getting sleep this week, tossing and turning... that fecking cat keeps poking at me when she knows I'm upset... Hayden's actually asleep before me :) - about an hour ago. He came into my room around 2, surprised I was still awake, just to check on me ♥ When he saw that I was sad, I reminded him that today is that one day at Spezia's, ya know, when we had to take Hannah to the doctor? He gave me a really big, REAL hug. We snuggled for a bit (thinking we may pass out together in my bed - you can see the tv from there = appealing to the Boy) and I realize how physical I was with Hannah and how I haven't been with Hayden... til now ;) He didn't like my bed, so we switched to *Daddy's Chair* but alas, it's been a mighty long while since the days I could sleep in a la-z-boy with both my kids!! We were really cramped, but snuggling in Mitch's chair with Hannah's blankie was great therapy for us both, no complaints :) I actually watched him fall asleep, got up quietly and smoothly, tucked him back in and have been wondering what the heck to do with myself ever since...
Honestly, it feels like if I start to cry I'm not gonna stop...
and if I don't cry, I'm not gonna get sleep...
Honestly, it feels like if I start to cry I'm not gonna stop...
and if I don't cry, I'm not gonna get sleep...
Saturday, February 10, 2007
My Keeper
Oh yeah! I'm doin the Happy Dance!! I got mine yesterday, just in time for this month's moon!! I heard of the concept of The Keeper (Diva Cup, Moon Cup) first on the motheringdotcommune; fascinating, for those wooo wooo hippie types of whom I'm not crunchy enough to count myself among. It was only available on the internet and I began saying, when I can walk in a store and buy it from the shelf, then I'll have one. Karen has one; last summer when we were both bleeding at the Folk Fest, I was out of organic supplies and had to use gas station tampons for the weekend and she just kept dumping her cup!! Hmmmmm, rayon on the cervix or natural rubber in the 'gina? (not to mention the whole "no trash" thing is appealing!) I increased the intensity of my request to the universe. Last Friday, Eli and I were shopping at East Dakota and viola! there they were!! (which led to another of those cool conversations with Eli) They're stocking Size B (no vaginal birth), to see how they sell.... I ordered my Size A (post vaginal birth) and encouraged them to have this size, as women often learn about The Keeper from other mamas. For the first time in a while, I'm actually excited to get my moon time!!
Friday, February 09, 2007
breast - The Original White Milk
Mine was tinted sky blue, by the way, with a delicious yellowish cream (when separated, when homogenized - by shaking - it appeared white).
I remember Sandra's was much creamier white than mine, I mostly saw her colostrum.
Gramma Bunnie said blue milk kills babies, that's why her doctor told her not to breastfeed. All human milk has a bluish tint; though diet really affects taste, color and scent. Women who eat lots of curry have milk that looks and smells like curry :) Kangaroo milk is hot pink.
On behalf of everyone involved with the babyhood of the author of this comment: I'm so sorry you were deprived of the loving connection your mother's milk would have provided for you. I only hope you are able to heal and realize the deep necessity for the promotion of this relationship for the future of our planet.
I remember Sandra's was much creamier white than mine, I mostly saw her colostrum.
Gramma Bunnie said blue milk kills babies, that's why her doctor told her not to breastfeed. All human milk has a bluish tint; though diet really affects taste, color and scent. Women who eat lots of curry have milk that looks and smells like curry :) Kangaroo milk is hot pink.
************************
A Lactivist mama in Ohio was asked by the National Pork Board was asked to C&D from selling t-shirts reading, The Other White Milk. The C&D was fine, but their comments:In addition, your use of this slogan also tarnishes the good reputation of the National Pork Board's mark in light of your apparent attempt to promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption, such as with the following slogans on your website in close proximity to the slogan "The Other White Milk." "Dairy Diva," "Nursing, Nature's Own Breast Enhancement," "Eat at Mom's, fast-fresh-from the breast," and "My Milk is the Breast."
On behalf of everyone involved with the babyhood of the author of this comment: I'm so sorry you were deprived of the loving connection your mother's milk would have provided for you. I only hope you are able to heal and realize the deep necessity for the promotion of this relationship for the future of our planet.
***********************
Funny addendum to this story:
While showing Eli the blog updates, we began discussing the whole Pork Board issues, breastfeeding... ya know all the weirdness! Trisha (Eli's sister - 25 weeks pregnant) calls because today she noticed a wet spot on her bra; upon checking her breasts, she squeezed a nipple and clear fluid came out. They're working!!! They're gearing up to feed our newest baby pickle!!
Funny addendum to this story:
While showing Eli the blog updates, we began discussing the whole Pork Board issues, breastfeeding... ya know all the weirdness! Trisha (Eli's sister - 25 weeks pregnant) calls because today she noticed a wet spot on her bra; upon checking her breasts, she squeezed a nipple and clear fluid came out. They're working!!! They're gearing up to feed our newest baby pickle!!
Thursday, February 08, 2007
"The Secret" Playdate
I had a surprise of a good time this afternoon!! I had my space invaded by toddlers for the very first time! We moms planned to watch The Secret episode of Oprah, and were lucky to be able to pause and discuss various pieces of the puzzle. The compare/contrast/melding with "What the Bleep?" was fun, too. I had the most fun talking to and hanging out with the babies. They were so excited to discover Patches on my bed, then for the freedom to play in there and jump freely on the bed! Meemers especially loved it when Patches "said meow" when she petted her :) 
Prairie even had the honor of entering Hayden's domain and get an up-close peek at his cool game :) She told me that she loves Isaac and Hayden, they're her boyfriends! Later, it was so sweet to see her snuggle under my blankets with Isaac :)
*******************************
Sometimes I really do feel disconnected, bubble-wrapped and distanced but it sure seems like going through the motions isn't a terrible thing.When I manage to get my head outta this crazy mourning fog, we'll rejoin for Bleep and The Secret! It was very fun...
El fuego del momento llegó a ser el temor
We got some cool fire implements while shopping the other night. Lots of candles from the clearance bins, a 14" lighter and one of those funky bend-it-over-to-light-deep-ones kinda lighter. It's been a 60s Love Den 'round here, ever since.
(I love how my memories of reactions to emergencies always seem so Jamie Sommers-esque, in my slowed down for effect yet highly efficient, heroic actions)
I'm at the computer and Hayden's in the other room. That smell. That smell. Once it hits that primordial cortex sumsuch in your brain, you must react. I know, too, in this moment, I've gotta slow myself down and breathe before, during and after any and all interactions with Hayden. My panic = His shutdown. So I ask, where is it? what is it? He says it was a napkin and he got rid of it. WHERE?? It's still smoking in here!! That was it. I yelled, he shut up. I had no time to negotiate. I followed my clues and pulled the sofa out and there was a lovely little smouldering corner! I calmly grabbed the cat's water and put it out. breathing, breathing, breathing. I opened the door to let the smoke out, so as not to alert anyone else in the house. I said, wow! that was scary. He agreed. I apologized for not remaining calm and began my justification/explanation, which was shut down quickly, as he doesn't want to talk about it. [unspoken ending: because you'll freak out.]
I need to freak out about it. Too bad I shot my wad on not-even-close-to-this-important stuff, so I don't have any turns left in this circumstance. I breathe. I know, I know, I know that fear is oftentimes the best lesson in itself, there's nothing a naggin' scared spitless mama can say that he didn't already have go through his mind in that split second of realization that he wasn't Safe. I bet it's an amazing tale from him though. I can't wait for him to tell me (and I'll be vewy, vewy quiet).
While snuggling up the other night, I did tell him that I understand he doesn't want to talk about it, and I'm okay that he doesn't want to talk about it right now but that eventually, we will talk about it. Now to bite my tongue until he believes it's safe to talk to me about it.
We did joke last night about peeing on it next time ;)
(I love how my memories of reactions to emergencies always seem so Jamie Sommers-esque, in my slowed down for effect yet highly efficient, heroic actions)
I'm at the computer and Hayden's in the other room. That smell. That smell. Once it hits that primordial cortex sumsuch in your brain, you must react. I know, too, in this moment, I've gotta slow myself down and breathe before, during and after any and all interactions with Hayden. My panic = His shutdown. So I ask, where is it? what is it? He says it was a napkin and he got rid of it. WHERE?? It's still smoking in here!! That was it. I yelled, he shut up. I had no time to negotiate. I followed my clues and pulled the sofa out and there was a lovely little smouldering corner! I calmly grabbed the cat's water and put it out. breathing, breathing, breathing. I opened the door to let the smoke out, so as not to alert anyone else in the house. I said, wow! that was scary. He agreed. I apologized for not remaining calm and began my justification/explanation, which was shut down quickly, as he doesn't want to talk about it. [unspoken ending: because you'll freak out.]
I need to freak out about it. Too bad I shot my wad on not-even-close-to-this-important stuff, so I don't have any turns left in this circumstance. I breathe. I know, I know, I know that fear is oftentimes the best lesson in itself, there's nothing a naggin' scared spitless mama can say that he didn't already have go through his mind in that split second of realization that he wasn't Safe. I bet it's an amazing tale from him though. I can't wait for him to tell me (and I'll be vewy, vewy quiet).
While snuggling up the other night, I did tell him that I understand he doesn't want to talk about it, and I'm okay that he doesn't want to talk about it right now but that eventually, we will talk about it. Now to bite my tongue until he believes it's safe to talk to me about it.
We did joke last night about peeing on it next time ;)
My Horoscope for the Month
Gemini:Your surface is bright and sparkly, but underneath there are some deep feelings at work. Hey, you can be both. Just remember to take plenty of time for yourself if you feel like your emotions need attention. - from midco.net
<3<3<3<3<3 <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
It's not really but it could be!
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Tomorrow's (meaning after sleep) Plans...
Gemini: Today you are quite happy to drift off into other dimensions within the privacy of your own mind. If you are clever, you won't even need to tell anyone that you are going away -- for they won't even notice. If, however, everyone seems to be on your case because you don't seem to be present, you may need to change your tactics. Indulging your fantasies is a luxury that you can get away with only if you cover your bases in the real world.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I guess that means tomorrow (meaning after sleep) should look like: early morning run for coffee while Hayden sleeps in, combined with a trip to the grocery store, then some major, caffeinated art work!!
Artwork's a comin...
I look at our current wide expanse of floorspace and I know that tomorrow, I gotta gather my schtuff from the corners of netherwhere and get to work :) Christine, I love you, I'm so glad you've come here and I'm grateful to share this journey. I've got big dreams for your gift, chickie, just know it's on it's way.... much love every step of the way. I look forward to the catharsis some artwork can provide... maybe the new paints brought along a singing muse (oh lookie, there she is!) Wooo Hoooo! It's gonna be great! I got Gramma Baby's 89 to create for, Lisa's and Jeanie's 40s... :::::Happy Dance:::::
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
How does he do it?
I'm on some weird haydenesque schedule and I don't like it at all! I'm disoriented to be so awake at midnight... He woke up after about 5 hours to Skype and WoW, and is still hanging out watching his DVR favorites by candlelight and while playing with magnets.
We had a moment last night, a scary one that he's not ready to talk about yet and frankly neither am I. I'm going to hang out and see if something comes out of him.
Tonight, we had Chinese food and Elton John on South Park - what a great combination! And in between I carried on a funny text message conversation :) I'm gonna lay down and see if I can sleep...
We had a moment last night, a scary one that he's not ready to talk about yet and frankly neither am I. I'm going to hang out and see if something comes out of him.
Tonight, we had Chinese food and Elton John on South Park - what a great combination! And in between I carried on a funny text message conversation :) I'm gonna lay down and see if I can sleep...
What a day...
I got up at the way early crack of dawn, really! Well before 6 am. Hayden's sleeping pattern has shifted round the clock, once again; he was still awake. We hung out and talked for a couple of hours, then he was desperate to make me some scrambled eggs... too bad the eggs weren't any good :( I made some good coffee and fed him some cereal and some fruit. I hopped in the 'net for a bit and he passed out. I used George's van - the Eurovan, oooooooooh - to send packages, deposit a check, and the biggie: changed my family status on the housing waiting list. I picked up some amazing comfort food, everything bagels and cream cheese!! So to the rattle of horrific judge shows in the background, I spend my lonely afternoon blogging about nothing... not a bad day. I may sneak in a nap.
Monday, February 05, 2007
XX Constitution Blues
FOURTH AMENDMENT [U.S. Constitution] - 'The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated..."
The 1973 case of Roe v. Wade resulted in a landmark judicial opinion regarding privacy and abortion in the United States.[1] According to the U.S. Supreme Court's Roe decision, most laws against abortion violated a constitutional right to privacy under the Due Process Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment. The decision overturned all state and federal laws outlawing or restricting abortion that were inconsistent with its holdings.
*****************************************************
At the heart of Roe v. Wade is the belief that the constitution is blind; blind to all facts but that you are a citizen of the United States of America. Here in South Dakota, our rights as American women is once again being threatened by HB1293.
I won't even talk about the fact that the info came on the inclusive homeschooling list, gathering support for the bill stating: The legislators in Pierre have put in a new abortion ban bill, which includes exceptions for rape and incest, as long as the proper law enforcement authorities are notified to protect the women and girls from the criminals.
Read it, it's scary and medieval. Sometimes I find it really hard to believe I can be so much smarter than folks who go through life thinking they're the smartest ape in the jungle. Even deeper, that there's a god somewhere who finds purpose in these insanity-causing lives and said god probably feels some kind of affection for them, love perhaps? Some days I'd rather not be so smart, or maybe I'd just rather be an atheist.
The 1973 case of Roe v. Wade resulted in a landmark judicial opinion regarding privacy and abortion in the United States.[1] According to the U.S. Supreme Court's Roe decision, most laws against abortion violated a constitutional right to privacy under the Due Process Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment. The decision overturned all state and federal laws outlawing or restricting abortion that were inconsistent with its holdings.
*****************************************************
At the heart of Roe v. Wade is the belief that the constitution is blind; blind to all facts but that you are a citizen of the United States of America. Here in South Dakota, our rights as American women is once again being threatened by HB1293.
I won't even talk about the fact that the info came on the inclusive homeschooling list, gathering support for the bill stating: The legislators in Pierre have put in a new abortion ban bill, which includes exceptions for rape and incest, as long as the proper law enforcement authorities are notified to protect the women and girls from the criminals.
Read it, it's scary and medieval. Sometimes I find it really hard to believe I can be so much smarter than folks who go through life thinking they're the smartest ape in the jungle. Even deeper, that there's a god somewhere who finds purpose in these insanity-causing lives and said god probably feels some kind of affection for them, love perhaps? Some days I'd rather not be so smart, or maybe I'd just rather be an atheist.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Sunday's Musings
Today may be a quiet day of introspection that can help you get to the root of an important emotional issue. It isn't about what comes at you from the outside now, for your psychological patterns can override your current experiences. Don't run away and hide; you really don't have to be perfect to make your life run smoother. Try making self-improvement part of your daily routine. Sunday, February 4, 2007
******************************
It was nice to curl up with Hayden yesterday. I missed the collective cooking sisterhood day, but I did get some good Boy time and some time for us both to enjoy the less-clutteredness of our home at the moment. I didn't get out to see the drummer in action, too cold! But I did get a post-performance phone call :) Last night he was willing to brave the cold (well below zero wind chill!!) and brought over lots o'wonderful Sushi & Ginger Ale for the three of us; we watched Waiting for Guffman and Elizabethtown, while Hayden played WoW and watched Like Mike 2. All very sweet and funny. He loves Patches and she's glad for it -- she even scored some kick ass tuna in the deal! We munched on Challa (yes! I'm prepared for french toast!! organic whipping cream, even) and chatted til he couldn't stay awake a moment longer ::vbg::
Shall be a great time when it happens again! and it will probably happen again soon :)
******************************
It was nice to curl up with Hayden yesterday. I missed the collective cooking sisterhood day, but I did get some good Boy time and some time for us both to enjoy the less-clutteredness of our home at the moment. I didn't get out to see the drummer in action, too cold! But I did get a post-performance phone call :) Last night he was willing to brave the cold (well below zero wind chill!!) and brought over lots o'wonderful Sushi & Ginger Ale for the three of us; we watched Waiting for Guffman and Elizabethtown, while Hayden played WoW and watched Like Mike 2. All very sweet and funny. He loves Patches and she's glad for it -- she even scored some kick ass tuna in the deal! We munched on Challa (yes! I'm prepared for french toast!! organic whipping cream, even) and chatted til he couldn't stay awake a moment longer ::vbg::
Shall be a great time when it happens again! and it will probably happen again soon :)
Saturday, February 03, 2007
PUSH! HB1267
If any of you feel so inclined... women need to be empowered in this state (we're not terribly far from chattel, 'round here!)
In the Spirit of Karen, please: Go to WomanKind Midwifery and there are loads of details right there on the homepage, with a simple 1 click to write the legislators your very own message! And who cares if you aren't from South Dakota! I think it'd be groovy for them to know that others are watching!
Home Birth is Safe and Beautiful...Every Woman Deserves this Option!
And as it stands now, SD is blatantly saying NO, and that's not cool. This has got to change.
Friday, February 02, 2007
We're halfway!
It's official, I'm both up far too early, and it's half way between Solstice's longest dark and the Springtime balance of Light and Dark. I'm mothering our Circle tonight, I look forward to strengthening my faith and once again, renewing my light.
It will be an inspiring evening, following a challenging day of organizing, planning and preparing (the space and my kid). I hope to see Eli, all 19 years of him already. The Gift of Eli deserves it's own post, ah, but his brightly shining, gift of light should not go unnoticed on this holy day.
I wanna sneak away for a bit later on, to see some Wumpus... a well deserved distraction from other issues I've got with the passage of yet more time.
The laundry no longer visibly towers... now to conquer the hiding stuff!! ***whip cracking***
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)