Unconscious Mutterings, from a long ago March

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Dogma :: Karma; as in running over your...
   
2. Spirit :: of Life, come unto me.
   Sing in my heart all the stirrings of compassion.
   Blow in the wind, rise in the sea;
   Move in the hand, giving life the shape of justice.
   Roots hold me close; wings set me free;
   Spirit of Life, come to me, come to me.
3. Voodoo :: Who do?
   
4. Demon :: -oid
   
5. Digital :: photography rocks my world!
   
6. Ceremony :: is to make sacred.
   
7. Research :: is the human condition.
   
8. Career :: outside of being YOU, is highly overrated.
   
9. Penis :: envy? if only to write my name in the snow.
   
10. Film :: is an art and science I do miss.
    

Thematic Photographic - Drab 4

After 17 months as an Oregonian, green has become a staple to my existence. The sight and scent were both acutely missed while my California view remained some version of this drab perspective; complete with the windshield bug decoration.

Unconscious Mutterings

The best word list ever!!!

I say ... and you think ... ?
Road trip :: extraordinaire!
Pool hall :: Ed's a shark!
Extraordinary :: me!
Jackson :: should never be spelled jaxon
Heartfelt :: wishes of love for stressed out drivers, especially on my highway
Wet :: and slimy
Strangle :: disintegrating body, sharp mind
.com :: Crash
Touched :: deeply
Insipid :: one 'man's Joy

Dance with Death, part iii

One day I'm in junior high, thinking about singing group tryouts and other 13-year-old thoughts, when the principal comes to the door, Arnie Bauer. I'll never forget him, such a sweet, sweet man. He gently led me to the hallway and explained that my grandfather had suffered a stroke and I was needed to care for my young cousins so Aunt Donna could be with her father, the aforementioned Grampa Harm Tilstra. My mom had instructed him to put me on the city bus, though he felt it was enough of an emergency to drive me himself, in his very own car. He comforted me on that ride, the first time I'd ever heard sincere platitudes. It was great comfort and it shifted, once again, the rhythm of my Dance with Death.
Grampa'd been to lunch with Aunt Darla at the senior center, when he had a stroke. They got him to the hospital and hooked up all their thingies and did all their little procedures... The first couple of days were blurred by the juggling of younger cousins. The feeling of being shut out of the whole process eventually came to a head. I demanded they break the rules, fudge my age (under 14s were not allowed off the elevator in those days & I looked 12!), whatever needed to be done so I could see my Grampa!! Tomorrow they said, tomorrow. Ah, I was so relieved, I would see with my own eyes, hear with my own ears, hug with my own arms!!
When I got home, it was too late.
He'd died.
I got nothin. A peek through the lavender tulle revealed too much make up on his dead-and-never-been-make-upped upper lip. And his hair was laying down on his head, instead of flopped over one ear, waiting to be pushed back up and over by his pinky-missing-hand. They'd probably buttoned both sides of his always-one-side-flappin union suit. Next time, they said, next time. I didn't believe them. I don't think Joanna did either; this funeral just done ruined her 3rd birthday, so she locked herself in the car. Smart kid.

The next Thanksgiving we spent with Gramma Bunnie and Grampa Bud; it was traditionally Grampa Harm's holiday, as he had usually been unwelcome at the Christmas festivities at his former mother-in-law's home. We all missed him, big and heavy and hurtin'. Then Gramma started crying. I did *not* understand; nor would I have wanted to at that point. I wanted to be selfish with my grief, sharing it only with those who loved him. She couldn't have loved him, she left him years ago and shut him out of her life. Little did I know, I would someday come to acutely understand what it means to mourn the father of (most of) your children.

Thematic Photographic - Drab 3

With this theme in mind, I offered Hayden a 10-cent tour of Bakersfield, home of my fav-o-rite oxymoron! With a name like Panorama it's just gotta be good!Yeah. Drab, indeed. Blech. I think Panorama should be copywritten, trademarked, or somfin, so this kind of disappointment stops happening. Or maybe it's the best plea ever to end our dependence on oil - bring back the real panorama that used to exist here, please?
(click picture to see oil derricks to the horizon)

Thematic Photographic - Drab 2

This poor hill, nary a flower to support...
especially drab in comparison to it's resplendent neighbor

Thematic Photographic - Drab

drab
adjective
1. lacking in liveliness, charm or surprise
4. causing dejection


Thematic Photgraphic

Thematic Photographic - Drink 5 & 6

Just as I get into the swing of things, the topic changes! So, I'm sneaking in a couple of late additions ;)Our loved ones are immortalized on The Grammas' Fridge.
That first Christmas with Mitch, his bare chest, Santa Hat and an ice cold Mickey's,
led almost directly to the creation of that there beautiful ballerina.
I raise my imaginary (must be, it tastes good) beer to you, my love,
and offer heartfelt Thanks! for everything, really.
~♥~ ~♥~ ~♥~
Hayden said Old people are cute on our way home from visiting The Grammas and Grampa Bob. We're sure he was talking about Gramma Mimi and not Gramma Baby,
me and Gramma Baby decided today.
Then there she goes, that beautiful old woman, leaving me this perfect snapshot of her life and it's just plain cute! We were sure she got her dose of pepperoni pizza ♥ and I had the honor of holding that there cup for her and wiping the pizza grease from her shaky hands.
From Snoopy cups and bendy straws we journey -
God willing, the journey calls us
right back to Snoopy cups and bendy straws.

Thematic Photographic - Drink 4

This was mere decoration before I came along.
I was brave enough to make tea for the whole family at one time.
In between visits, it lives as decor on The Grammas' counter,
Where every glance brings a thought of me.
Gran & I shared a pot of decaf Stash Chai, because we could;
Joanna will do the same in July (God Willing).
We are so blessed.




Thematic Photgraphic

Meet Art

I love this recycled scrap-wood art the guy was selling;
sandblasting winds be damned!

How are you today?
Great, how are you?
Psychotic, but in a good way!

I picked the goddess balanced with both male and female power, as he jubilantly explained.
I got to kiss his statue for luck
and he welcomed some Hannah/Patches ashes into his man-bag.
My purchase brought him 15$ closer to his goal for the day;
I pray he met that goal with great Joy.
Art of the Goddess, for the Goddess, by Art.
It's even signed.
I am so blessed.

Venice Beach Drum Circle

Out of the Tatooine-like sandstorm that was the Venice Beach Boardwalk,
Joy Observed Joy Multiplied...Relocate the joy, and it still multiplies...The power of the human spirit cannot be quashed by man nor god.

Thematic Photographic - Drink 3

Good Mornin' Los Angeles!
Ain't it funny how much better the coffee tastes if someone makes it for you??
Thanks Christine! Thanks Gary!
Thanks coffee growers & pickers & roasters & transporters!

Wanna play along?

Thematic Photographic - Drink 2

Break out the meds, diana's in town! ♥
Thematic Photographic details here

Thematic Photographic - Drink

Sushi and Beer, just the way Mitch liked his dates with Christine.
~♥~
My first foray into this photography project.

Contrary Meme

Stolen from Jeff Sabo,
who openly admits to stealing from Frank Maier and Laura Flynn Endres
feel free to steal from me ♥
__________________________________________________________
15 Things you DISLIKE, HATE or CAN'T STAND & everyone else seems to like/love

1. FOOD
The very best Tamales made by YOUR grandmother. Still gross.
(same goes for her specialty dish containing any variety of internal organs)

2. DRINK
sports drinks (really, they don't make your teeth itch?)
anything containing artificial sweeteners (you can't taste that, that, that chemical haze in the back of your tongue?)
beer (there are more pleasant ways to obtain a buzz, lots of them)

3. BAND/MUSIC GROUP/SINGER
It used to be that I didn't like Mitch's music - White Zombie on our first date - so when he insisted on playing EZ E for me, I insisted on singing along... something about those words coming out of *my* mouth convinced him that maybe that wasn't the best soundtrack for our life. I still know all the words.

4. SEASON
Summer vacation season - I don't want to be anywhere where everyone is going to be at the same time. Sweaty crowds are not my thing.

5. SPORT
American Football. Kickers specifically, because they're not *allowed* to be tackled, they're from Italy: Fragile. Eat turf or get off the field, I say <3 Play REAL *foot*ball with the rest of the globe.

6. MOVIE
I refused to the The Titanic at the theatre, Joanna saw it more than 15 times. Good, yeah; great, nah. I'm not a big fan of Donny Darko nor the Saw series.

7. ACTOR
JIM CARREY. If I hadn't ever seen him be sweet on Jenny and her son, I'd want to run him over with my car. Luckily, I'd just rather never see him acting on any screen in my life again.

8. ACTRESS
The brainless ones, ya know like how I used to like that guy from Northern Exposure until he started dating Bo Derek, who makes Farrah Fawcett look intelligent...

9. TV SHOW
ER - I have pictures of myself on set at Warner Brothers; I still miss Chicago Hope with Mandy Patinkin ('ello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you have killed my father, prepare to die).

10. BOOK
Eat Pray Love It's a joke by now, everyone I know has read it and enjoyed it on some level. I've received two paper copies and the audio version. I don't know why, I'm a voracious reader cum listener who's tolerated far worse... even the insipid, truly insipid, Memoirs of a Geisha, and still can't make it past the old guy's house in India.

11. CAR
Anything new that sucks gas! My 20+ year old Honda car got 30+ mpg, it's obscene that there's any car made today with less!!
oh, and I think the new rounded Volvos are hussies.

12. HOLIDAY
Memorial Day* we're so busy in the country that we had to schedule a day off work so people could remember those who've died before - really?! That just seems sad sick and wrong to me - and to the folks who only get their headstones washed and read on the last Monday in May.
*with the caveat that you use it to Remember My Birthday

13. WEATHER
Strong sun, especially on the beach.
My whiteness loves the overcast, rainy beaches in Oregon - with bonfires, of course!

14. COLOR.
Black - not a big fan of sharing my lint collection with the world, nor investing my hard earned cash on lint removal -- lint camouflage is the best investment!

15. RECREATIONAL ACTIVITY
Hiking... though this may change in light of the recent HUGE increase in physical movement of diana - mostly I like camping where you drive up, unload your car and camp :)

Dance with Death, part ii

Gramma Bunnie, the ironically nicknamed ex-wife of the aforementioned Grampa Harm and mother to my mother, had a little brother named Uncle Lydell. He's our family's encyclopaedic entry for Asshole.
We'd spend nearly every Sunday of my young life in their mother's home, Gramma Emma, in a tiny town 18 miles away. There were two kinds of Sundays at Gramma Emma's house: Drunk and Angry or Happy and Peaceful; the happy/peaceful version usually included homemade cake and scoops of icecream from the deep freeze in it's own dedicated room. It's easy to guess my favorite kind of day. The positive food reinforcement didn't work though. Uncle Lydell still showed up. He was still angry. He was still medicating his pain with a lot of alcohol. And he didn't much care who knew he was upset, he needed to GET IT OUT!!! So he did.
On those days, I don't remember what it was that got the man so freaking upset, though I was glad to know it wasn't me (one less pissed-at-you-adult was a freaking sacred gift in my world). I'd just sit under Great-Gramma's sideboard and play with the molded plastic train piggy bank, discolored and smelly coloring books, broken crayon chunks, and a few other ancient toys we kept stashed there, just for these moments.
Lots of crying on those days, always the women; the men didn't step in and stop anything until the end, when they convinced him to go have a smoke and calm down.
It still wouldn't be safe to come out for a while, the weeping women would sometimes grab you up into their suffocating busoms, smelling like tears and misery, and it was just plain confusing; so unless I really needed to pee (and I could dart from my vantage point) I stayed put.
For hours.

Then Uncle Lydell met Karma. Though I bet if he described the situation for you himself, it's more like he met Karma-as-Kali, farm-style.
Deservedly so, my then 8-year-old-self decided and at 40, I still concur.
My inner child's version of the tale; for authenticity, I'm not verifying facts with the family, ymmv*:
Uncle Lydell was baling hay with a neighbor, when the neighbor was called away. Now, everyone knows that you're never to bale hay alone, it's way too dangerous. Lydell did it anyway. It was believed the twine meant to cinch the grass-cubes became tangled and, instead of turning off the machine to deal with it's malfunction, he reached into the running baler, the twine cinched his wrist, he was pulled into the machine and, consequently, his fat ass made the thing explode. They came to Aunt Mary with glasses-in-hand; glasses they found in the neighboring field.

I don't remember who told me, maybe I listened at the door while my mom retold the story for friends on the telephone. First thing I really remember is standing outside our green stucco house, outside the white picket fence, the sun shining on my face and I felt JOY! The next trip to Great-Gramma's was guaranteed to be a Happy and Peaceful one with Cake and Ice Cream Cones. I was getting too tall for the hidey-hole, anyway! I'd get to hear the windchimes over the voices, every.single.time. In that moment, I came to realize that Death could be a release, a happy, happy release. If not for the dead guy, for those who had to put up with him while alive.

Then I walked into the house.
Mom was crying. Gramma Bunnie was crying. People were sad. It made my skin crawl.
WHY? Feel what you really feel, for goodness sake people! We all hated the man, we're all glad he's gone, he'll never ruin another day at gramma's for us, why would that make you sad??!?!?!?!
Then I was just plain pissed. My parade was rained out by hypocritical tears and snotty nonsense. I didn't go to the funeral. I think Mom wanted to keep my giddiness at home. I kept my frustration and confusion to myself. To whom do you bring these feelings?
Again no one had anything to help me understand.
Alone, but for those niggling questions and a deep, burning desire to find different ways to do this whole death thing. There wasn't a lot to believe in, in my young life, but here I found faith, faith that I could move beyond what had been my experience, thus far. A faith that has proven unshakable.
____________________
*ymmv = your miles may vary

Unconscious Mutterings

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Sunburn :: Prevention
2. Aquarium :: not good in an earthquake
3. Otter :: Hearst Castle
4. Awesome :: Me! says Christopher Moore
5. LOL :: ROTFLMAO song
6. Accordion :: Grampa Bud
7. Hot Pocket :: Pleasure Chest
8. Grandstand :: Sioux Empire Fair
9. Shaved :: No Thanks
10. Upgrade :: Evolution

Top 25 of 1986

It's meme month for me (& Frank, it seems :::bg:::) So here's another one for ya!

Top 25 songs of the year I turned 18 - I almost posted the top 100 (I heard R.O.C.K. in the U.S.A. on the radio, just last night) but it was indeed too embarrassing. Really! How much did we, uh, drink to make this music okay? or that hair? Frank, you should feel much better about too much otherFrank on your list, at least he didn't overdo the eyeliner!

For further entertainment, I've thrown in pictures of me on or near my 18th birthday, with gay-boyfriend Dave (Rita), best friend-turned-lesbian Becky, and my totally normal (not a testament to anyone's gayness, merely their abnormalities in general ::bg::) little cousin Trisha (mama to Bre) - oh! and gay Dave's boyfriend Ray. I graduated on my 18th birthday ♥ May 27, 1986

1. That's What Friends Are For, Dionne Warwick, Elton John, and Gladys Knight
2. Say You, Say Me, Lionel Richie
3. I Miss You, Klymaxx
4. On My Own , Patti Labelle and Michael McDonald
5. Broken Wings, Mr. Mister
6. How Will I Know, Whitney Houston
7. Party All The Time, Eddie Murphy
8. Burning Heart, Survivor
9. Kyrie, Mr. Mister
10. Addicted To Love, Robert Palmer
11. Greatest Love Of All, Whitney Houston
12. Secret Lovers, Atlantic Starr
13. Friends And Lovers, Carl Anderson and Gloria Loring
14. Glory Of Love, Peter Cetera
15. West End Girls, Pet Shop Boys
16. There'll Be Sad Songs, Billy Ocean
17. Alive And Kicking, Simple Minds
18. Never, Heart
19. Kiss, Prince and The Revolution
20. Higher Love, Steve Winwood
21. Stuck With You, Huey Lewis and The News
22. Holding Back The Years, Simply Red
23. Sledgehammer, Peter Gabriel
24. Sara, Starship
25. Human, Human League

My Dance with Death, a foreword

It started as a comment on Melissa's blog, then expanded to it's own blogpost... as it lives in the draft file, this here tale grows and grows and grows. As I can only write it in chunks: chunks of emotion, of vocabulary, of memories, of time, so too will it be easier to read in chunks.
You are heretofore invited to participate in my first ever serial, err, serial something that just might turn into a real novel/memoir/book/ABC afterschool special/somethin, someday, though not today...

and so it begins:

Death, in my family's tradition, is the root of all hypocrisy; uh, not fair, mayhap Death merely casts away the shadows that hide our family's tradition of hypocrisy. At least, my first glimpse of hypocrisy came with my first taste of death. And death comes with an expensive lesson; every time. As Life partners with Death, so do I; in a Dance of Balance and Understanding.
I learned those first steps early in my life... perhaps from the very beginning, as I understand my mother's labor was sparked by the death of her grandparent. Born of Death, Bourne of Death, me.

My Dance with Death, part i

Living at Grampa Harm G Tilstra's house in Harrisburg (next door to the house where my parents lived when I was born) was one of my favorite times in my childhood. Though I was not yet 3 years old, I had incredible freedoms because I was small & quiet enough to play and wander (never crossing the RR tracks nor the highway, sans help) without calling the attention nor wrath of the gumpy guy who was sometimes a fun grampa.
Once, after I'd gathered up my little doll-playing friends on Grampa's porch, I reenacted what I'd seen him do earlier, out of their sight: I stood with my hands on my hips, my face into the wind and announced "Smells like rain" and sat back down. Sho'nuf, it began raining in earnest moments later and I cinched the title as coolest kid in town. For that unbeknownst-to-him assistance, I'll be forever grateful.
Burned into my memory, dinner around the table, Hank Williams Jr. or sumsuch on the radio (warming my little hands near it), out of one of those "ringed" tupperware bowls, soft pink, green or blue. I couldn't yet easily see over the top of the table from my chair, the decades of finger smudges on the lower cupboards kept me entertained visually while the adults rambled on and on. I distinctly remember asking several times for clarification on what we were eating. Chicken they said, every time. A baby's equivalent of chicken, my ass ran through my head, every time. I saw those rabbits. I fed those rabbits. I'd been scratched to kingdom come (said my grampa) by many of those rabbits. When not being used to move rabbit poop to the strawberries, Grampa let me use the wagon to drag stuff around town. We was intimate.
Then the day came. I returned from my wandering adventures and ran towards the hutches. Stopped short, I saw it hanging right there over the top of the garage door, the left door, waaaaay up there, looking waaaay down at my little stunned self, the face of my favorite bunny. His beautiful-though-lifeless black and white dotted shell now ready to be sold to become decoration, for sure, which I kinda understood. But this was my favorite one. Some kind of stiff, cold, old Dutch retort came my way, Grampa's version of that's life, kid and I was expected to hitch up my big girl panties and ride on outta there. No apologies, no explanations. Life.
At Chicken Dinner that night, I stretched and looked up at those faces and I knew something had changed, something had ended; I could no longer trust these people to tell me the truth.
I've never again been a fan of bunnies; nor adults who lie to kids.

40 (more) Odd Things about diana

You know the drill! 40 ODD things about ME!
Learn 40 things (more) about me and I'll learn 40 things about you.
Once you've read this, it's your turn ♥

1. Do you like blue cheese dressing? Not my favorite and a current no-thanks

2. Did you ever smoke cigarettes? Yes

3. Do you own a gun? Yeah - Grampa's shotgun (currently at mom & dad's) and co-owned a couple of hand guns with Mitch (which he sold immediately upon his brain tumor diagnosis) a Colt .380 and Glock 9mm. It was recommended to me that I carry a concealed weapons permit in my wallet, even if I don't have a handgun, to deter any thief who might get access to my wallet and think of following me home. I've thought that would be such good advice, if it didn't feel so fear mongering-ish.

4. What's your favorite drink at Starbucks or & almost every single other specialty coffee shops? Giganto Soy Mocha (uh, NO I can't have the whipped, hence the SOY request), sweeter the better

5. What do you think of hot dogs? John Morrell's Pink Puddin' - which makes me a HUGE fan of Hebrew National - they answer to a higher power - with Goulden's and sauerkraut, bun lightly toasted. Windmill's in Jersey anyone?

6. Favorite Christmas song? We changed the Hippo Song lyrics last year: from teacher to google ;) Any big song in a big group of folks, thinking of a tiny baby and peace on earth - that's my favorite!

7. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Coffee, coffee, coffee (to the tune of holy, holy, holy :::bg:::)

8. Can you do push ups? Oh yeah! I can't wait, in fact, to graduate to real weight-bearing-on-the-arms yoga ♥

9. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? My wedding ring. I sometimes wish I could still wear it, 'cept I'm not married anymore, that whole death parting thing.

10. Favorite hobbies? Knitting/felting, television watching, opinion sharing ::bg::, blogging, photography

11. Do you have ADD? No deficit here a'tall thankyouverymuch - nor do I approve of labeling any other human being with a deficit. If you're not worthy of attention, seems to me YOU'd be the one with the deficit, not the person refusing to attend you. Then again, that's just me. Look! shiny!

12. What's one trait that you hate about yourself? No thing I hate about myself. What's one trait I am focusing some attention on lately? my tendency to withdraw and crab without provocation. Q-TIP is my mantra.

13. Middle name? The one in the middle. Lea. Like Lee but for a girl. So said DeLila when I came home crying because she gave me an ugly boy's name - not that the name was ugly, it belonged to an ugly boy. Not cool. She showed me the difference, I was calmed and whattaya know, it led, a million years later, to a life-changing conversation with Mitch. All from a bottle of Worcester Sauce.

14. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? I love this laptop, Sabrina the teen aged witch is a great peek into how the other side doesn't really live, coffee is goooooooooooooooood

15. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? Mexican Coca-cola (sugar, no corn syrup), soy mocha, water

16. Current worry right now? Not finding the mailbox key, I'm starting to miss my insipid magazines...

17. Current hate(s)right now? There's that Hate word again! Current "burrs under my saddle blanket" -- uh, I don't have any worth discussion and discussing them seems to make them more important than they really are. So the answer really, is nothanks.

18. Favorite place to be? Right here, right now - 'cept it'd be nice if the dog AND the boy would stop farting.

19. How did you ring in the New Year? With a bell.

20. Like to travel? Yes, in fact we're gearing up for a long-overdue road trip! Hayden and I are heading to LA for a few, some, many days.

21. Name 3 people that you hope will complete this? you, you, and You

22. Do you own slippers? My favorite Xmas present ever: Sally and Jack slippers from Hot Topic

23. What color shirt are you wearing? Green Yoga top from Old Navy (see dianas365.blogspot.com)

24. Could you ever make it 39 days on the show Survivor? Thank God Almighty No!

25. Song you sing in the shower? I'm pretty much always singing in my head.

26. Favorite girls names? Hannah, Molly, Esther, Yves (eve), Helena

27. Favorite boys names? Harrison, Henry, Louis, Xavier (said the french way Zav-i-ay)

28. What's in your pocket right now? No pockets.

29. Last thing that made you laugh? Hayden

30. Worst injury you've ever had? Probably the broken jaw 8/85, though it really wasn't so bad, they gave me codiene ::bg:: I think that time I flipped my thumb back - that probably hurt the worst!

31. Do you love where you live? OH YEAH!

32. How many t.v's do you have in your house? 2, plus two computers

33. Who's your loudest friend? Willow & I love her for it!

34. Does someone have a crush on you? huh, YEAH I'm sure ♥

35. What's your favorite candy? Chicko-sticks are dairy free!!!!!!!!

36. What were u doing at 12 AM last night? Dozing and thereby missing the last half of the new Law and Order. I'm gonna watch that as soon as I'm done here!

37. What were u doing at 7AM this morning? Waking up, so as to get breakfast with the family when we drove Scotty to work.

38. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up today? Sunnyside Up BREAKFAST! ♥

39. What's your favorite holiday? My Birthday, the Holiest of all HOLYdays ;-p

40. What are your plans for tomorrow? Homeschool Central, then SUSHI for Freya Day and to celebrate Bree's birthday - with Hayden and Drew and Elaina, too ♥

Unconscious Mutterings

Play some free associations:

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Mourning :: For eternity
   
2. Approval :: Unnecessary
   
3. Lotion :: Lavender Oil
   
4. Pespire :: ONIONS (be sure the N is pronounced thru the nose, "uhn- yuuuhn")
   
5. Language :: Multi-
   
6. Defection :: Survival
   
7. Play :: landing with your foot in your mouth
   
8. Graphic :: Novels
   
9. Spicy :: Cake
   
10. In love :: Comfort
    

made for me or what?!

My Very Own Tree of Happiness

The ever amazing Zenmomma has given me this Tree of Happiness Award. This award gives me the opportunity to list 6 things that make me happy and then I choose 6 friends to tag. Tena, Amy, Renee, Carelia, Linda, Kat
Just one more thing my friend Mary and I have in common, a seasonal melancholy malady, generally called February. In skipping the list of the well known & obvious causes of great joy in my life, I bring you the stabalizing forces of joy that brought me through the heavy Februaried shadows and into the bright sunlight of a much lighter-hearted march through March.


1. My friends. Yeah, maybe this is a known and obvious cause of joy, it is indeed one worth putting in the #1 spot. From messages to my favorite breakfast to phone calls to surprise offers to walk to sacred mementos to cards to thoughts and prayers. I am well-loved. And that is the most healing gift I could ever be offered. Namaste, my sisters, namaste.


2. Yoga. Yoga. Yoga. Three classes total so far & all I can say is a Neo-esque "Whoa" I am flexible, I am calm, I am quiet, I am strong, I am soft, I am whole. That has been the gift of Yoga, thus far. heh, I'm sure I'll never complete the list! ♥ Did I mention I'm in love with the Eagle Pose? And I can do it and balance without a brick.


3. Cash Economy. Jon Gold has some amazing things to say about the benefits of cash. In case he thinks his words are in vain, he has inspired our family to live without any electronic forms of currency. An adjustment to be sure, and a worthwhile one thus far. We live within our means every moment of every day & viola! we can live *well* within our means! It goes hand in hand with our Be Here Now philosophy. Not to mention we're saving a bundle on bank fees!



4. Charlie the Unicorn *snort* Jennerson. Being his pack leader has been the biggest lifestyle challenge since becoming a parent for the first time. He demands a level of physical activity heretofore unheard of the the world of diana. Thanks Charlie! Thanks Cesar! Thanks me, for knowing the dog's health trinity is more important than the comfort of a sedentary lifestyle. And Thanks to Whomever designed the really cool chemicals that are released in the human brain during activity.


5. Audiobooks on MP3. Oh baby! From Stephen Frye reading the entire Harry Potter series to my first foray into listening in Spanish; from Stephanie Plum to Kinsey Millhone; from Loving Neil Gaiman's reading to abhorring Stephen King's; from several attempts at Eat Pray Love (no, I'm still not thru it!) to running through The Appeal; I look forward listening to new friends and old, reliving and learning, experiencing and remembering. My bibliophile heart can love to listen, too! ♥


6. Taking pictures. I love being in love with where I live! Mostly I love that no matter how blue I might feel, there is green waiting to greet me, just outside my door. The oxygen of outside is sometimes enough to make the difference in the direction my day is heading, emotionally. I make a point of documenting the life around me, to remind myself of the constant cycle, the constant renewal, the tiniest of all examples of the miracle of life on this planet. I am awe-full every single day. For that I am not only happy, I am eternally grateful. Go ahead, click on my green spot and prepare to be surprised and, I hope, inspired.

Describe Yourself in Song

Using only song titles from ONE artist (your choice), cleverly answer these questions.

Not that easy...try it...then ask some good pals to do it too :)
(that'd be you, dear reader)

I chose to use songs by artist: _________________________
Yeah, right, you don't know?
You'll have to guess
(I'm changing answers now, to make it harder!)
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1. Are you male or female: Sweet Painted Lady

2. Describe yourself: The Wide-Eyed and Laughing

3. How do you feel about yourself: Stone's Throw from Hurtin

4. Describe your ex boyfriend/girlfriend: Love's Got A Lot to Answer For

5. Describe your current boy/girl situation: Harmony

6. Describe your current location: Town of Plenty

7. Describe where you want to be: Simple Life

8. Your best friend is: Amazes Me

9. Your favorite color is: Indian Sunset

10. You know that: I Meant to Do My Work Today

11. What's the weather like: Just Like Strange Rain

12. If your life was a television show what would it be called? One Day at a Time

13. What is life to you: If There's A God In Heaven (What's He Waiting For?)

14. What is the best advice you have to give: The End Will Come

Where I'm From

I am from cast iron skillets, from SPAM and yellow mustard.

I am from the green stucco house, cooled in the summer by daddy's hose.

I am from the tomato patch, the lilac bushes and the sound of wind chimes.

I am from Christmas at Gramma Ellis' and obesity, from the Petersons, Tilstras and Lamberts and Harm and Kate.

I am from the card sharks and peacemakers.

From those damned Indians and trailer trash.

I am from hardy midwestern Dutch Reformed and Lutherans. We love deviled ham sandwiches, fruit punch, and expect kids to be seen and not heard.

I'm from Harrisburg, SD, Dutch, German and Indigenous, scrambled eggs with tomato sauce and parsley and spice cake with coffee frosting.

From the explosion of the haybailer containing Uncle Lydell from which they only recovered his glasses, the birth of a dark chocolate baby boy to two white married folk, and the man who changed his last name to match his best friend.

I am from musty black pages, cemeteries filled with stones, the house with the splintery stairs, the rabbit hutches & strawberries, rattlesnakes, cowboyhats and alcohol-as-medicine, carnies, horseback riding and Watkin's salve.

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A mad/lib type meme from this template.