Wheel of Fortune

Wheel of Fortune
May Change support your growth.
Deck: Cagliostro
My Daily Tarot Reading
card art © US Games

The central theme of what is traditionally called the Wheel of Fortune card is cyclical change. The Wheel keeps on rolling, churning events in a ceaseless progression of ups and downs, either way freeing us from the past. No one can escape its cyclical action, which can feel somewhat terrifying -- no matter whether we are rising or falling. When one is balanced on top there is a moment of crystal clarity, but the only part of the Wheel not going up and down is the hub, which is your eternal Self, the Source of Freedom.

Every one of us will occupy all the points on the wheel at some time or another. The cycle of the wheel is its lesson -- and we can learn to take comfort in it (as we do when we celebrate our birthday). If you don't like the look of things right now, just wait -- things will change. Of course, if you do like the look of things right now, enjoy it while it lasts, because that will change too!

Wumpus

There they are... in the bar where we met.
I kinda dig the guy on drums.

Would You Be Friends With Yourself?

I find this question difficult, not a one word response. I'm a tough friend to hold on to.
I wonder how much attention I give to BEing a good friend. Oh, I'm nice and I'm a heck of a lot of fun, I've even got great ideas for schtuff! Then I don't show up. I don't call. I don't answer the phone. It's icky. Then, later on, I do show up and I expect everything to be jes'fine! Blech!
What is that?
What's the payoff?
Why would a woman with the world by tail, suddenly let go to pretend to look at butterflies?
It's not that I have better things to do, I'm not having a session of wild sex or being swept off to Paris for the weekend, heck I'm not even particularly melancholy. Just asocial. Not gonna deal with people. Zero desire. Manners out the window.
A stand to be taken. What kind of friend am I gonna be? Who will show up tomorrow? What will I say to mySelf when my gumption is gone? What will conjure it from netherwhere? What will I say to the girls? What coaching do I want? What coaching will be effective? What will it look like? What will it feel like?
I got some majik to work out!

The intimacy of a blog

Hypocrisy. That's what a blog calls you on. Oh it's great for tracking your own growth, what you learn and how you use it. It's generally a safe place for one's rants and raves through growing pains. And then one of those raving moments comes back to test your true resolve.
I made a pretty strong point when questioning the reasons behind those who have conjured me into their lives, only to decide otherwise. In my recent surround of Wisdom (I recommend the trinity, er, trilogy of The Journey Home, V for Vendetta and The Matrix) I realize my role, the gifts for me, the gifts from me, and the gifts of me. I wrote that blog carefully, so as not to transmit false orders onto the gods-that-be, but to indeed find a way to conjure some gratitude for my own lessons and growth. Then I found this really cool picture to end my rave, a reinforcement of the order I consciously place with the Universe. And here I am... realizing someone was listening. I'm swimming through fear and joy and wonder and gratitude and a million other tingly things that don't yet have vocabulary, which are beyond categorization.
It's funny to hear the voice of my fiercely independent and single-partying Self scream, "but we're not ready for our last first time!!" To which the fiercely independent, OWL facilitating, sexually free chick responds, with tongue clucking, "My god! It's sex!! It will be grrrreat!! hellllloo?! We deserve it!" From the comfy corner, surrounded by flannel and fleece, the matron who is welcoming and ready, ♥ is too breathing a sigh of relief as the moon tide washes the decision making out of our hands for a few more days.
I love the soap opera of my own mind.
It's a great thing to be open, it's a great thing to be alive while we still can be.
It amazing when we honor the contracts of our Soul.

I have the answers...

Thanks Jackie!

My own Journey Home

Divine timing... my entire life is about divine timing! I was called to purchase that book, I was called to finish reading it, I am now called to examine what the story means in my own life.
Our hero, Michael Thomas, learns incredible lessons of faith and truth and love... his journey is shadowed by his own former, not-yet-evolved Self, the Self full of fear and anxiety about change, the Self of comfort and knowing even at the cost of happiness. His present Self has to confront the Self's shadow, stand strong and choose a new path, a path without comfort, the path of the unknown, the Soul's true path, the path without guarantees, the path of risk, the path of Faith, the path of becoming more than who is possible right this moment.
I'm there, I'm at a new place, yet another new opportunity in my life.
A chance to confront my shadowy fears and get on to the sunshiney life I deserve.

All I ever needed to know, I learned from Ree

Just when I thought I had exhausted her kitchen wisdom, I stumble across this -- now I gotta schlep my ass down to the store again for some Steak! Quite honestly, I have no idea how to cook a steak well (well, I can brown chunks well done for burritos, et al, but not an actual steak I'd eat). I'll begin the quest for the cast iron skillet... don' worry, I'll be sure to document my cow flesh adventures!

Blizzard Bonus!

We had a real SD Blizzard move through this week - what a treat!! The weather geeks are so excited that we have weather they're all beside themselves with JOY!! As the excitement began Thursday night, my trusty news engineer went to work in the evening and slept on a studio sofa sans blankets, so as to be there in the morning when everyone would be demanding some live news about what the heck to do when the entire city shuts down because of unexpected (March has historically always been the snowiest month here) dumping of glorious snow! I got to welcome Scotty at the end of his show, and turn over my kitty and my bed for some much needed slumber on his part.

Me, on the other hand, I was sure to garner a trip to the grocery store from Ed... not only to enjoy his company and commentary on the weather, but also so I could do some cookin' with Ree!!! It was just that kinda day :)
First, I whipped up a chocolate sheet cake with Hayden. We're now baking the professional way with each ingredient carefully measured before we begin anything; makes me feel sooooooo Martha :) There was a bit of confusion, as Hayden read the recipe to me, we quickly realized that 4 heaping teaspoons of cocoa just don't have the same effect as 4 heaping tablespoons of cocoa will! Even if I didn't realize it until it was poured into the pan, didn't matter! We sprinkled on the extra cocoa and mixed it into our cake pan with a baby whisk! Ooooh this picture just can't convey the... oooey gooey loverlyness that IS this cake! Oh and because it's mine, I sprinkled half of the cake with dark chocolate chips!
And what the heck, while I was heating up our kitchen anyway, I thought I'd whip up some o'Ree's lasagna, too! Turns out I was missing some key ingredients for her recipe (like Garlic!), but I did have the basics and a lovely jar of Newman's Own Organic to pinch hit! Now I gotta say, I'm not one for meat in my pasta. Ida, the amazing Italian red-headed mother of an amazing former boyfriend of mine, inspired my cooking greatly! She (and then me) was a big fan of vegetarian pasta dishes, with her (and now mine!) wondermous meatballs served on the side. I must say, though, I really love the gr. beef/hot sausage mixture Ree recommends!
As the pasta cooked, Scotty realized his time with us was limited, as Wumpus was to begin recording their Zombie music last evening... He was really sad to leave at feast time! Just as it was time to eat, we received the fateful message: Recording Session canceled for the weather! To celebrate, we had some of this! Which has only fueled Scotty's need to be at my house, near me, snuggled up and hibernating on my bed! And because I know the way to man's heart is through his Soul, I offered him some of this














And in return, I got this















I'd say we had a house of very, very comforted Souls and happy, happy faces!

I am so flattered...

...I think!? I just got this in my inbox at MySpace:

hello there,
are u into casual sex? im looking for a mature older lady to teach me some things...

First, I'm truly honored this kid thinks I've got some lessons he'd like to learn (probably so, nah, a verifiable truth); Second his assumption that I'm mature is a double edged sword for me: I doubt a mature (in the miss manners sense) woman is gonna be humping on a 19-year old from Menno, SD -- truly in any sense of the word, maturity would not play a part here, I don't see it; Third, older? older? Couldn't he have chosen: seasoned? ripened? peaking? experienced?

at least he called me a lady :::bg::: (again though! see my arguments with mature)

All this and he probably just wanted to ask me how to find the g-spot!

For your consideration: Scotty

Greetings. To those who have wondered about the mysterious interloper in Diana and Hayden's lives, I humbly offer the following, for your consideration.

My name is Scotty. I'll introduce myself as Scott, but should you be inclined for a second (or further) meeting, I'll always refer to myself as the above with the addition of they Y suffix. My mother always called me this, and it helps to differentiate myself from a famous California serial killer.

I work at a TV station, in production. This means that I spend time in a darkened control room, pressing buttons which then reward me by lighting up in multiple colors. I'm easily amused by such instant-reward devices.

I've been in college for what seems like twenty years or more. I probably should have started earlier, but I'm convinced that I wouldn't have been ready for the experience had I not been what I am, a thirty-something non-trad. I've played music all my life, fostered by my loving parents. This continues to this day, and I'm lucky enough to have surrounded myself by positive, accomplished musicians (although I'd never tell them this directly, to maintain a necessary facade) who I adore and love to make silly, fun, obnoxious music with. good people, they are.

What else would you like to know? I'm semi-secretive, and cherish my privacy. I'm a firm believer in universal karma. This translates directly into my dealings with other humans/animals: be nice, and in return, your life will be easier and more fulfilling. Don't be a jerk, or one's life will be less than it could be.

My past, present, and a look into my brain, to ease any concerns. Something new in my life is the addition of H and D. She's very, very different from other people I've dated, and I find her incredibly inspiring. i reeeeeally like her. i promise to you, her audience of internet people, that I shall treat her with the glorious respect she most clearly deserves.

I remain,

scotty