Dianazation of the English Language!

It's official! I'm taking over :) Thank you to Christine, for your insight and humor... more of this list to come, I'm sure of it!!!

Dianasize (verb) : to Diana-size one's food, to take apart a food item and re-assemble in a more appetizing way. ie., ZoAnne, stop dianasizing you taco and just eat the dang thing!

Hurricane Diana (noun) : when Diana visits and brings with her a swirling wind of activity, joy and, yea, maybe some destruction. ie., I'm hiding in the room when Hurricane Diana blows into town. (guess who? :-)

Dianazation (adverb) : when a room is re-done in one day with mismatch floral prints and mystical type objects. ie., We went to Target & a botanica to complete dianazation of the bedroom.

Divine Spark of Diana (noun) : Acknowledgment of the divinity within persons named Diana and anyone else feeling sparky. ie., The divine spark of Spanky took the form of a nude Goddess Diana Doll in clay.

Anti-Diana (adverb) : Anyone who's dour, cynical, unethical, inauthentic, uninspired, generally cranky and boring. ie., That Anti-Diana woman probably shops at Walmart.

Oral Dianarea (verb) : The ability to speak, at length, on topic, with volume and emphasis while delivering a controversial point of view. ie., We had to pull the plug on the mic when the speaker got Oral-Dianarea.

The Diana Vortex (noun): The whirly-swirlyness that is diana's energy force; resistance is futile! The cause of others to never actually leave her orbit permanently; you will be sucked back in.

Readjust Mercury so I can go home...

General Daily Overview: Today's gracious Libra Moon presents a dilemma, for while we attempt to balance our needs with others, we can also feel the pressure of responsibility as the Sun squares restrictive Saturn. We have no choice; we must slow down to navigate through the obstacles that appear before us. It could be challenging to make the right long-term decision, for we must respect authority in whatever form it appears, even if it is blocking the most sensible path.

Gemini (May 21 - Jun 20):Tomorrow, your planet Mercury reaches the end of its retrograde cycle and some aspects of your life should begin to move forward. But first you must answer to the harsh judgment of Saturn, forcing you to re-examine a difficult situation. Even if you are overwhelmed, nothing is impossible now. The feelings that are holding you back also contain the seed for your forward movement. Do not accept defeat, for today's discussions can set the stage for tomorrow's progress.

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The brakes are being fixed... I've got $100 donation towards that cause, the rest I'm leaving up to the fates... we will get home, safely and soundly (and maybe even sanely!).
Maybe this means the key to Happy Trails is to do my Zen Dish Duty and remain open to possibilities. Thank you Scott Noelle for giving me the terminology: Receiving Mode; I'm done asking, now I await the answers.
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Hayden was afraid to get up yesterday, he thought everyone would be mean to him... poor kid; no one was mean at all. This is where "sorry" works well... we all know it's not on purpose, it's just a general dislike of stinky. Jon was funny, as he covered the couch & chair skeletons with garbage bags and just because, he took the cushions off all remaining furniture - the house looks over flowing with cushions now :) We even played around imagining what to do with the skeletons, fill them to overflowing with throw pillows?
Hayden even said it's an okay situation to be funny instead of serious; it makes him feel better.

ATCs

I've gone nuts, it's official!! I *think* I've done about 26 cards over the last two days... some I was inspired to do to trade in the caption trade and *finally* participate in the Imagination Tribe, some I want to send on as Holiday Gifts and some were just plain inspired by the whirly swirlys currently around me (i.e. I made one of Buck before I knew it was his last night and another from my gods dream -- see applicable posts!). I made the Far/Near set in response to Tony's call... I wish one of us would just say: "Ya know, I think we should stick around one another for a while and see if this *this* actually becomes something." In the vein of not wanting to be the grownup, I'm not gonna be the one who says it... oops! too late!

This set is my Tribal Set. These are in response to the women I have gathered around me lately... lots of fire dancing theme going on last night... the quote is "Speak to the goddess and she will answer" The bottom one is a mis-matched tribe and the word "Wild"; the last one is one I made specifically for Jeanie and it's women dancing 'round a fire with the word "Sister." (I'm sending it off to Tony today with his cards... ask for it if he doesn't offer it!!)

Happy Trails, Sir Buck

Today's the day...
I'm so sad for Tony.
I'm so glad for Buck.
Cancer sucks, Heaven rocks.
Tony's grateful.
He's proud.
He knows returning the gift
is the right thing to do.
He's honored to have known this Spirit.
He's honored to have loved.
His heart is stretching.
Feels like breaking,
but it won't; it can't.
It keeps beating.
Stronger for the exercise.
Better for the practice.
Open to something new.

Today's Stars

Diana's Horoscope: ...You may be running tapes through your mind about issues at home, about your feelings, or about memories from your past. Unless you can keep your mind away from personal issues, you may as well take the afternoon off.

But that's always true!

Well put me over the barrel and gimme the pickle!

Ya know, sometimes Life just sucks... and worse yet, I can see the why it sucks and how easily it could unsuck in one place, but I have can't yet see the possibilities of Life unsucking all the way around. And it's a car. But it's the brakes, they're important ya see, and, unfortunately for me, expensive. I kinda need 'em to get home, but if I buy 'em I can't get home. I can take the car to another place, but I'm gonna have to pay that savings (praying the 2nd place is cheaper) to the first mechanic for his time already spent investigating my brake situation. The lady called, as I talked to her I ate a fortune cookie: Your sly nature will get you out of a tight spot. I gave her the sob story: it's fix the car and be stranded or don't fix the car and pray we make it home. The price did miraculously drop by almost $80 overnight, maybe Greg will decide he doesn't need to make any money off the sad girl this year. Even at cost brakes are a PITA, but c'mon, I'm good Karma :) I *can* stay here, I can figure out a way to make the next cupola weeks easier to be here and that's a big possibility. It really is beautiful and magical here (the sun just came out as I'm typing - yay!!) That would mean we won't be home for Mitch's Death Day (which actually now sounds appealing...), nor the biggies like the women's retreat *I* scheduled, nor our first Full Moon Circle; oh yeah Thanksgiving falls in there, but the idea of quiet nothing sounds appealing there, too.
It's just one of those days when being the grown up just fucking sucks.
Hm, it's funny that I sit and worry about Hayden through all of this and I remember the talk I got from Marty and Madelyn... Hayden will be Hayden in whatever context Life doles out, it's best to parent in a way that keeps us open to one another and in a way that feels good, not to take his frustration personally while I'm striving to provide the tools for him to alleviate his angst (all the while striving to minimize my cause of said angst). It was an "on the right track, mama" with a great shift to an objective perspective. (If I may summarize... it was pretty powerful to listen to their take on the Hayden/diana situation; they were honest and open, direct, I'd even say hardcore!)

Delirious Dreams

Last night I fitfully dreamt, as I tossed and turned wrapped in Hayden's Aunt Karna woobie.
I remember cursing at the gods, convincing them that I stand before them NOT as their own personal plaything, but as a flesh-and-blood human being and by-golly my feelings count! I threatened to become atheist, worse yet faithless, turning my back on them, not only firing them from their jobs, but eliminating the position entirely, casting them into nonexistence (even worse than Neil Gaiman's American Gods). I don't know if they reacted (sumbitches!), but I felt empty, not even able to cry. But with bizarre insight and clear vision -- Focus. Always an unfocused focus, clarity and no where to cast it. Kinda like at the hands of the schoolyard bullies I was intimately familiar with... ooooh, now there's some psychotherapy waiting to happen!
Can we say RETROGRADE? Danggummit, I'm really feeling it.
I got no gumption. I got no spark. Blech.
Apathy, my worst enemy.

On an upnote, Hayden came in later and snuggled with me (with Hannah's woobie!).

I read in my new Woman's Confidence book from Kelli - it's one of those open anywhere for Wisdom books - the woman spoke of forgiving her Past Self, the one who's behavior makes her cringe upon reflection. She imagined that Past Self cowering in shame for causing such pain to her now Present Self. None of what had happened was with malicious intent toward our Future Self (though some might have existed right there for the current Present Self). When we hold that message in our hearts and come to know and own Who We Are Now as a beautiful culmination of our Past Selves. Life really is For Giving and BEing forgiving, especially to ourselves. If I'm not on my own Team, who else will wanna be?

Ah, part of this was sparked, I'm sure, by a new blog Mary found: PostSecret.blogspot.com, it's odd and cool and disturbing and creative. I think I want to do some Secret ATCs, just for me to keep or share with others, secretly.


Life is so random.


'cept when it's not.

I guess Sandra was right...

good thing I'm off the alcoholic pathway:

diana lea jenner: At age 42 you will die from wounds delivered by a blender after trying to make your sixteenth margarita of the day.
(And it's only 3:00pm, shame on you!)

Our AMAZING Concert Experience!!

Totally worth the drive!! Just to hear the opening band ::bg:: To hear those pretty, pretty English boys (starsailor) sing unintelligibly until this unforgettable opening line: Doncha know you have your daddy's eyes... daddy was an alcoholic
Mary and I were first brought to tears by the touching beginning... then the next line, we were laughing so hard tears were once again filling our eyes!! I bought their album (which came with a free tee shirt) and we stood in line, giggling uncontrollably, to get their autographs... ooooohhhh they were even prettier up close!! Bass guitar player-dude looks EXACTLY like a young, hip, 21st Century Paul McCartney!! I asked about the song, but I think they wrote me off as some strange old giggling woman, but told me that song is not on the album I bought, but on the one titled: loveaseal, love-a-seal? no, loveaseal, by then I was back to giggling so hard and they were all making fun of my mislistening and the moment was gone... the song is playable on their page, it's called Alcoholic, hee hee hee...
Then, of course, out came James Blunt... the most amazing musician I didn't know existed ('cept I love, love, love the Weird Al parody and the accompanying story of music industry angst). I witnessed a real guy, one with scars and scabs, who still has faith in humanity and loves Life. His songs are anti-war and pro-woman... what more can a girl want? maybe james blunt in her bed and the rest of her life, too :) He needs me... someone let him know!
Oh yeah, the dancing monkey icons turn me on, too, 'specially since they're wearing crowns, awaiting their Monkey Queen ::g::

I made it!!

We're here!! I'm aaaahhhh-ing after my whole first day with the Zenmomma :) Life is GOOD!! (dangit, I didn't bring those socks!) The trip has already been wild and busy and all of that diana schtuff -- and yet it seems to be just beginning.
Hayden was happy and excited to see me on Friday, what a treat! I got to bring some Kathleen Coffee to Karen, so the first leg of the trip was aromatically pleasing! We had a great time hanging out in Rapid, we even did the MALL ::gasp:: AND had fun ::GASP!:: We got started later than I had planned, but the sleep and the morning with my happy, happy son were well worth it! We had a late morning trip to Hobby Lobby (they open at 9 am, in case you're wondering) to stock up on SpongeBob art supplies.
The second leg of the trip was the big chunk, 14 hours to Boise, ID! We didn't quite make that on my mind's itinerary, either, but that was all perfect timing... when we awoke from our rest stop nap, we drove under/through the most amazingly beautiful full-spectrum rainbow!! I called Kyra immediately, as the three of us saw more rainbows on the SW Tour than any other combination of folks; it was like she was with us in Spirit!
In Wyoming (to whom I owe an emphatic apology, it's not a horrifically ugly nor boring state, up north!) I got close to Little Big Horn. I got off the freeway, thinking I'd go to the site, but I just couldn't do it... so I released Hannah to the Spirit Winds and wished her presence to bring great peace to the Grandfathers still there. Sad reminder of how far we've not yet traveled in our evolution as Humans.
While in Montana, I crossed the Crazy Woman Creek (what a great mental image: me, the crazy woman for whom the creek is named) and the Tongue River (should they have met, mayhap the lady'd not be so crazy??), then we crossed the Bear Tooth Ridge. We drove through the northern part of Yellowstone, under the light of a nearly-full moon and shared some Hannah; we talked of the mountains, of living here, of the wildlife we didn't see and why that is, of loving the Earth as our Mother, of honoring the ebbs and flows of Life, of reintroduction of wolves to the wild, of keeping a wolf as a pet (and the natural follow up of Spirit Crushing and our societal ways of doing that to our young), of life on other planets, of the meaning of Smart, of the limitless possibilities of being human...
We finally made it to Boise on Sunday Morning and hung out with Big Joe and Dezmo all day. What a cool experience to see my long time friend as a parent, as a loving and *present* parent to his beautiful son! We reminisced and caught up, we played with the boys and talked our truths. It was most fun to hear Dez share stories of his daddy, Joe's pretty cool in my eyes anyway, but even more special through the eyes of a loving and whole 4 year old.
We left for Corvallis (guess when? yep, later than I thought), looking forward to the short and sweet 8 hour final leg of the journey. I trusted Mapquest, which kinda bit me in the ass! It was all well and good, until the very last mountain I had to climb before descending upon the Golds... Steep, Slow, Scary, Foggy, Rainy & Windy! About 80 miles of 30 mph on a road from which there is no escape, no pulling over and napping, no cell service to even cry to my friends!! At one point the clouds broke, I was on a relatively flat spot, the beauty was breathtaking, so I left some Hannah there, too. I FINALLY made it to flatlands, knowing that indeed, I am capable of anything!! We arrived safe and sound late last night, only to promptly pass out!
Today I got to have breakfast at the infamous Sunnyside Up! yummy, yummy, yummy! Since we've got an in with the owner ;) he even came over to hang out with us and watch us eat our perfectly crisp bacon with our organic eggs and perfectly seasoned taters. Oh yeah, I had a wonderful mocha, followed by an amazing regular cup o'coffee! yessirree, won't be having those Constipated Traveller Blues ANYmore!! ::g::
Oh yeah, you should all know that Mary cooked dinner tonight.
I got to meet Donna and see Joni :) and we watched Donnie Darko - a must see! (though not the director's cut, the original was awesome and I trust Mary's comparison) Run out and pick it up now!! (when you're done voting, of course!)
Tomorrow's the concert in Portland... Hayden's gonna have a blast picking Jon's brain about the Smoothie Shop plans ::bg::