..............Let that sink in a bit........................
I know! I found it a little shocking too.
Imagine all this time and we never suspected.
If you suspected you'd tell me, right? 'cause if *I* suspected, I'd sure tell you!
Most shocking, once you get past some serious oblivion on most of our parts, is that he would choose a Radical Rightwing Religious Cult when we have so many others to choose from, right here in Oregon.
There's one commune where only women are allowed, including no male children.
Maybe Scotty wants to suck me into that one so he can sell H on the Black Market?
There's another one called Friends Landing; it sounds like a very Tom Cruise-like approach to life.
Ah! that's it! Scotty wants his own version of Katie!!
There are MANY freaks in town with FSM stickers on their cars, pins on their jackets and even cookies shaped like piles of noodles.
Scotty really wants me to be touched by noodly appendages! And he wants to watch, maybe even take pictures :::gasp:::
There is a bible-of-sorts laying around my house, though maybe it's just his cover story, a diana diversion, it's called Church of the Subgenius.
That's it! Scotty wants us to join Bob's Movement, though the prescribed Slack actually prevents us from doing just that.
As for me, I'm gonna send Bob $30 so I can be ordained. Then I'll be able to do an official *triple bless* (like the Pope, a damned fine Cult Leader if I ever saw one!) on said Gossip, while releasing the Karma Hounds who will bring her a Life of Her Own so she can stay outta mine. Amen.
1 comment:
*The only person who should be offended by this post is The Gossip. To any one else (especially the Catholics), I sincerely apologize for my seeming insensitivity ♥
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